Dear goat

We went with the company in the Pushkin cafe on Tver Boulevard, the waiter approached us and, addressing me, said: "Here is the menu, sir."

We looked at each other for a long time, smiling, and said that the guys were driving a show -off. They, you see, have a style for the finger, who calls here with the girls here after the casino. And so that everything is harmonious and under Pushkin - the only one whom the finger knows, they are called the sogarians.

But then we began to think, but how the waiter had to contact us to like that we liked it. And then everything quickly switched to jokes, because all the options were essentially ridiculous.

“Comrade, here is the menu,” is if the waiter Lenin.

“Citizen, here are your dumplings ...” - this is in the factory dining room, where the dumplings themselves are not harnessed, but the borscht is cold.

“Countryman, take me beer! ..” - this is a sweaty queue at the barrel with beer in the seventies.

Then we began to think, and what shades for us wear all these appeals.

“Here Mr. Pupkin is trying to prove to us ...”, that is, we call him a master, but ironically. He is a fool, not a gentleman. If they want to especially humiliate the object of critics, then they write before the surname not “gentleman”, but “Mr.”.

“Gracious sovereign! ..” - this is five minutes before the fight, mainly on public disputes.

“Hey, young man! ..” or “Young man! ..” - let the old people say so, and we are still young. They say so, and then comments and edification begin.

“Hey guy! ..” or “Friend, tell me ...” - familiarly. Well, what kind of friend am I to you? Did we drink?

“Your highly blessed! ..” is a stem, with ladies, after a joke about the lieutenant of Rzhevsky.

“Your Excellency! ..” is such a joke, a hint of a friend’s bald head.

On the street, if you do not know the road, but a person goes ahead, then you shout to him: "Sorry!". He does not understand that it is to him. You shout again: "Sorry, be kind! ..". A person looks around for a long time, tries to understand who you are screaming. You can shout, of course: "Man!" Or "Woman, one minute!" But I can't shout like that. Such an appeal seems humiliating to me for who I am addressing. There is no good note in such an appeal. If they shout to me like that, then I turn out to be displeased, as if to say: “Well, I know that I am a man. And what do you need? "

In the subway, the excuses are still saved: “Sorry”, “Be kind”.

"Sorry, are you going out now?" - For me it is optimal. An apology is a sign of respect.

But I'm not always in the subway.

Vladimir Putin, at the inauguration, turned to Medvedev “Comrade President!”.

Wild?

How to say?

Mr. President? But here we are not gentlemen around. There, pensioners barely make ends meet. To call Medvedev "master" - to push the voter from him. And “Comrade President” is wild, but optimal. A word without signs of sex, but with a vivid sign of equality. Especially between Putin and Medvedev.

That is, the president in Russia is a comrade to all. He is the first, but among equals. He is nearby, and from this he heats up in his soul.

Do not say "Your Majesty." Of course, I would like to say so, but the damned constitution interferes.

All these strange and funny words determine our attitude towards each other.

Old became archaic. And the new ones will not come up with.

Interestingly, the language is being improved and enriched all the time. The Internet is full of nicknames, which are culturally called "nicknames." They even came up with Internet words that replace ordinary ones.

“Patstal” - this means that he is under the table, that is, he is funny, he is in admiration or shocked.

The language of drivers is enriched daily. An old "goat, where you can!" pronounced naturally and without strain.

But with simple appeals, without an offensive context, a colossal problem, because here you should show that you respect the one you are addressing.

And with respect to our neighbor we have a problem.

The incident of linguistics is that only what reflects the inner essence. The “Patstal” took root because it reflects the inner essence of the Internet after ten hours of sitting in front of the monitor. “Goat” is a harmonious feeling of a driver in a road traffic jam.

But in the appeal of the “gentleman”, in my opinion, the most natural, it is necessary to allow an advance and, most importantly, to adopt internally that the person sitting in front of you is smart, understands something and knows how in this life. And this is impossible for a Russian. Read any forum. Hiding behind a dog nickname, everyone urinates each other. It is in the forums, hiding behind anonymity and non -punisiness, that the Russian is natural.

And in international affairs.

“Mr. President, our good -neighborly relationship ...” is during a visit.

And they say without looking into the eyes of the interlocutor.

And then reality comes: Tajiks, Armenians and Vietnamese with stab wounds and broken heads lying in the bushes.

I was always amazed that in English there is no words “you” and “you”, but there is the word “you”. It seemed to me absurd. I thought everyone poked each other.

But it turned out that it was not their problem, but mine.

They explained to me that “you” is always “you”.

If this is true, then a lot falls into place.