Excites?

Everyone knows the best. They are awarded awards, bonuses, prizes. Well, what to do first from the end?

For such dubious achievements, they came up with such awards as “Silver Kaloshf,“ A paragraph ”and another prize,“ Bad Sex in Fiction Award. ”This award was found in 1992 by the Literary Review magazine and is awarded with metaphors and comparisons and hyperbole, which go to everything to describe the grass process to describe the grass process reproduction of the genus.

The winner receives a statuette parodying a movie Oscar, and a bottle of champagne. Over the past few years, a famous singer and composer Sting awarded the award.

In the first two years of the existence of the Pseudo-Oscars award, they immediately awarded the whole group of grief of the literature, and only in 1994 did a single and unconditional winner determine. It turned out to be a young talent Philip Hook with his work “Destroyers of the Stones”, which contained the following elegant description of the kiss: “Their jaws merged in the feverish mutual grounding. Saliva and sweat. Sweat and saliva ... ".
In the following, 1995, the award found her hero in the person of the writer and the famous TV presenter Philip Kerra with his novel “Ground Garden”. The phrase: “Its device of astronomical length looked strained and very concerned, because it was to fulfill a very elegant and at the same time mysterious and dark task” - did not leave critics indifferent.
In 1996, David Huggins became the winner with the novel "Big Kiss: The Riddle of the Gallery." The jury especially amused the proposal: "Liz was squealing like a wet rubber."
In 1998, the Folks Sebastian, the author of the work of Charlotte Gray, intercepted the palm of the championship, for such a paragraph: “Her ears scored the sound of soft, but frantic breath, and some time passed before she realized that she was making these sounds herself.”
And at the next ceremony, a certain A.-A. Jil, in whose imagination the female vagina turned out to be like an “exotic mushroom in a forking tree”. The sex writer was very proud of the prize received and even ordered that the image of the figurine would now be placed on the cover of each of his books.
In 2001, the jury found the worst description of sex in Christopher Hart's novel “Save me”, which should rather be called “The Blessed Slide”: “ Her hand moves up from my knee to conquer my cock, cold and lifeless, like the North Pole ... And when her hand reaches and grace my northern pole, I think in horror, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course. He wants to cover him with his tent "."
Cloth the first ten laureates of the Bad Sex in Fiction Award in 2002, the novel Wendy Perriam fell, in whose head a strange description of a naked man was born. It immediately took an honorable place in her novel “Walk softly”: “She imagined that under her clothes he was covered with thin stripes. The stripes looked very erotic, and even a member of G. Houses had seductive extreme flesh in a thin strip. The jargon, which he used during the consultation, turned into a bewitching love vocabulary: dorsal subluxation, the deformation of the bend of the first is the first to be pre -transplanted ... ”
2003 was perhaps the most stellar composition of applicants for the prize. Among the candidates, the popular American writer John Apdike, the famous detective man Alan Parker and even the cult fiction writer Paulo Coelho, who released the novel “Eleven minutes” about the labor everyday life of the priestess of love that year, lit up. There were also authors of such pearls: “She finished with a cheerful geeg of a flock of shortness of breath of the monkeys-Rezus” (Rod Lidles) and “ He caressed it as if looking for lost car keys” (Tama Yanovich). But everyone was left behind the Indian journalist Anirud Bahal, who in the “13th Bunker” work told the world that the woman at the time of the orgasm “makes the sounds of the Bugatti exposure motor.
Last year, the British Nadim Aslam, the author of the book “Maps of Forgotten Lovers”, was awarded the attention of experts for a well -aimed observation: “Her shoulders smelled of his armpits, as if the head of a prison of a humming pollen,” but never became a winner.
The laurels of Glory went to the American writer to Wolf for the novel “I am Charlot Simmons”, telling about the life of a prestigious American university. Here is one of the love scenes: “She tried to concentrate on her hand, which could explore the entire landscape of her body, including not only otorhinolaryngological cavities - Oh God, not only the border where the breast flesh is connected to the chest - no, the arm seemed to put banks throughout the body.” Tom Wolf said in his defense that he wanted to make sex "clinically honest." By the way, he turned out to be the only one in the 13-year history of the award by a laureate, who never appeared to pick up his prizes from Sting's hands.
The most mediocre description of sex this year, as it turned out two weeks ago, belongs to the feather of the restaurant critic of the newspaper The Times, Giles Koren, who decided to try his hand in the writer's field. In his debut novel “Winkler”, the penis of the protagonist is very unusually described, who “twitched as a shower thrown into an empty bath”. You can’t say anything - a successful debut!

http://www.lookatme.ru/flows/seks/posts/41430-15-meshnyih-istoriy-pro-seks

The materials of the site www.sexplorer.ru were used.