Jokes

Jokes

The mother caught her son with a cigarette and scolded him: “If you smoke, you won’t live to see old age!” – Grandfather over there smokes, and he is already 60 years old. – And if I didn’t smoke, it would be 80! - Petrov, you would make an excellent criminal. - Chief, what are you talking about? “You’ve been working for me for ten years, Petrov, and no traces of your activity are visible.” – Do you know what real bad luck is? - What? - This is when you sit down in a haystack and a needle sticks into your ass, which you lost there a month ago. A drunk man climbs onto the bus and plops down on the seat next to the priest. He reproachfully: “Do you know, my son, that you will go straight to hell?” The drunk rushes to the door screaming: “Let me in!” Open up! I got on the wrong bus! – So, patient, you must take these medications for the rest of your life. - How is it, doctor? You wrote in the recipe: take it within a month? - Well, in principle, this is true... - Kuma, do you know what mine was up to? - What? – Cross a cow with a giraffe. - Come on! Why should he? – He wants her to milk at home and graze at the neighbor’s!