Jokes

- Please don't kill me! I have four children, my wife is pregnant, the loan for the apartment has not been paid... Although... you know what? Kill me!

A German arrives in a Russian village. He sees the grandmother chasing geese from the garden and yelling:
- Well, get out, you damned goats!
The German is perplexed: the goats seem to be large, with horns, but these are clearly birds. Asks grandma:
– Tell me, why do you call birds goats?
- Yes, because these pigs trampled my whole garden, dogs!

- Olya, let's go to the cinema!
- Let's go, Seryozha.
– And your boyfriend won’t mind?
– I don’t have a boyfriend. His husband killed him.

The husband comes home and sees bare feet behind the curtain. Asks his wife:
-What is this?
She challenges:
- Well, what do you think, my fur coats and diamonds were bought with your salary?
– I’m asking you, what is this?
– And an apartment with a car is also on your salary?
– I repeat: what is this?
- And in general, think about it, why did you get a new position last month?
“I’m asking you for the last time: why does the breadwinner stand barefoot?”