Assault on the brain

The victory of the "New", the fight against terrorism with the help of the keyboard and body part of the deputy

After the publication in Novaya, the Bolshoi Theater changed its mind about spending 5.4 million rubles. to the new website In Issue 13, 2011, we talked about the fact that the Bolshoi Theater wanted to introduce a new website “as part of the implementation of a set of events dedicated to the opening of...

After the publication in Novaya, the Bolshoi Theater changed its mind about spending 5.4 million rubles. to the new site

In Issue 13, 2011, we talked about how the Bolshoi Theater wanted to introduce a new website "as part of the implementation of a set of events dedicated to the opening of the historical stage after reconstruction and restoration." We were embarrassed by the fact that almost all the options described in the terms of reference are already present on the existing version of the site. It was completely incomprehensible why then spend so much money.

And on February 10, the auction was canceled "based on the decision of the customer."

Reason for cancellation: "According to the fair comments of the participants in the order placement, the terms of reference included in the tender documentation do not give an unambiguous understanding of the nature of the services provided." Link to order details here. The author of the text is not signed. According to the Internet community, which actively monitors the waste of the budget, this phrase reflects our entire state system: there is no “unambiguous understanding” of anything.

But we hope that the creatives from the Bolshoi will come up with a new version of the site and order it - for a reasonable fee.

To fight terror at the sports facilities of the capital buy office equipment

After the terrorist attack at Domodedovo, when Medvedev angrily "cut orders" to strengthen transport security, transport workers vowed to immediately solve all problems. They showed Dmitry Anatolyevich the cool complex contraptions allegedly installed in the subway on Okhotny Ryad, containers for bombs, they promised to patrol all important objects in the company of superdogs with supernoses. And what? The public procurement website should, in theory, burst with applications for special equipment and metal detectors. However, no such tenders can be found. Bomb containers are not bought in bulk.

But such a competition was discovered "for the right to conclude a state contract for the provision of services for the maintenance of the ticketing system, access control systems and the detection of sabotage and terrorist means, and an intruder alarm system." Order No. 0373200023011000008 from the Megasport Sports Palace in the capital, on Khodynsky Boulevard, 3. The contract value is 2 million 900 thousand rubles. Terms of service provision — from July 1, 2011 to December 31, 2011.

How are the customers going to counter terror? With the help of equipment, namely: 10 rotary turnstiles, 12 barcode scanners, Wi-Fi access points, 2 ticketing system servers, a control computer system unit, 11 Zebra ticket printers, 5 manipulators - a mouse, and so on. It is good, of course, that everything helps to monitor safety and gives confidence in the future. The only embarrassing thing is the absence of a cynologist in the order and a box for mines, which were announced on TV.

The deputies ask to insure them against the loss of the jaw along with the teeth and from “crushing of the substance of the brain”

The deputies of the Rostov region laughed when they publicly declared that they have a brain - and it needs protection!

But this is so, if you believe the documentation of the “order for the provision of services for insurance against accidents and illnesses of deputies of the meeting of deputies and the head of the administration of the Komissarovskoye rural settlement of Dubovsky district of the Rostov region.” Order No. 0158300055911000001.

The municipal customer is the administration of the Komissarovskoye rural settlement. The initial (maximum) price of the contract (Lot No. 2) is 5200 rubles, (one) year from the date of conclusion of the contract. The most interesting in the terms of reference and application 2.

TK first. The customer’s list of insurance risks includes the following: injuries from accidents or improper medical procedures, as well as “death due to accidental acute poisoning with chemicals and poisons of biological origin, death from suffocation due to accidental inhalation of a foreign body, death from drowning, anaphylactic shock , hypothermia of the body.

Appendix 2 is a large and very detailed "table of insurance payments as a result of traumatic injuries, improper medical manipulations, poisoning (in% of the sum insured)".

Almost every body in the future of the insured deputy is described here.

The nervous system is on the list: the first item is brain damage (contusion, “compression” by hematomas, “crushing of the brain substance”, etc.). Nothing bothers. Our officials are not the first time to spend money on something that does not exist in nature.

Next on the list is "injury to the spinal cord at any level, cauda equina" (a great term for the people's representatives). Then - damage to the organs of vision. The deputies also want to insure against problems with the digestive system: for example, loss of the jaw along with teeth, loss of the tongue, fracture of the tooth, etc. What else threatens the officials: tissues, dislocations and fractures. There is a clause: "Rape of a person aged 18 years or older." Do we have many 18-year-old deputies? And why do the Rostov servants of the people insure themselves against rape?

In the US, a famous woman insured her ass. We always look at America and repeat everything.