Beautiful Russia

I have three girls I know. Beautiful blondes. If someone saw me sitting with them early in the morning having coffee, they would think it was a fashion photographer selecting models for a group shoot.

Or that this is the head of a famous charitable foundation sitting at an after-party with Gwyneth Paltrow, Scarlett Johansson and, say, young Svetlana Svetlichnaya after a big concert in Barvikha luxury village.

We should drink coffee if they were actresses or models. But their occupation is completely different. Gwyneth Paltrow is a VIP headhunter who either hunts for me or hunts me. In a professional sense, of course. Svetlana Svetlichnaya is a lawyer from another city, and we know each other because we are members of a closed club that unites the two percent of the smartest people. It's such a joke. And Scarlett Johansson is a socially active Internet figure, and we crossed paths precisely on social Internet topics.

I wouldn’t have thought how I could get my blondes together for morning coffee if it weren’t for the work that the completely apolitical me found myself in. Working in an organization that is completely apolitical in monitoring the correctness of the election campaign and vote counting, I suddenly learned that:

- Scarlett Johansson is a candidate for State Duma deputy from A Just Russia,

- Gwyneth Paltrow is a member of the political council of United Russia and the supervisor of one of the candidates for deputies,

- Svetlichnaya is already a deputy from the Communist Party of the Russian Federation, only in the city assembly.

At first I thought that was it, now it will certainly never be possible. However, voting day turned out to be a joyful one for all three. “My protégé got into the Duma,” Paltrow beamed.

“The results are good. The Pzhiv party gained less than half, and this is taking into account the massive and absolutely unprecedented dumps and falsifications. We can say that we are pushing them back,” Svetlichnaya wrote back. Well, Scarlet, who became a deputy, did not write anything. Where should I write to her now?

It would seem to rejoice and rejoice. But Scarlet, as befits a real politician, was on Triumphalnaya. And, despite the crust, she was hit in the stomach by a riot policeman. Having seen a repost of her status “I was beaten by riot police!!!!” on my Facebook, Gwyneth sternly said: “Don’t give in to provocations.” I don’t know what Svetlichnaya would say, because it’s already night in her city.

I looked at the footage from Triumfalnaya, at the “cosmonauts” - riot policemen and gopniks in green, and at the people on the other side and thought. I would take my Gwyneth, Scarlet and Sveta, and put the first three numbers on the list of a party that could be called, for example, “BEAUTIFUL RUSSIA”. And the program would be written about only one thing - to turn all the freaks into people.

After all, if you live in beauty, it is easier to endure both the crisis and inequality. And you don’t have to think about whether the rest of the world loves us or doesn’t love us. Because everyone loves beauty.

And there won’t be any need for any posters or ugly newspapers for the campaign, because they will be on the covers of all magazines – from Harper’s Bazaar to Teleweek.

And now Rynska can be nominated for President if she behaves well.

And let there be opposition.

Of brunettes who look like Audrey Hepburn.