God was put on trial. In Russia

In Russia, citizens are waiting for God to be prosecuted. God, you ask? He is God, how can he be sent to court and jail, and 15 days of arrest? Do you think this is impossible? It turns out that it is possible if you follow the letter of the law and all the by-laws, of which a huge number have accumulated in Russia over the past 20 years.

My colleague, Vasily Melnichenko, a photographer from Omsk, wrote a statement addressed to Alexander Bastrykin. Bastrykin is known to be an expert not only in promising self-harm to Russian journalists, but also a Czech agent. He is the head of the Investigative Committee, one of the gray cardinals who knows everything and can do everything, and nothing happens to him for it. So, Melnichenko, having analyzed his extremely rich and colorful life as an Orthodox citizen, came to the conclusion that religion is a lie and pure deception. The evidence base for such blasphemous statements is present.

As a resident of Omsk noted, in 1988 he voluntarily accepted baptism, depositing 10 Soviet rubles into God’s personal account. Upon receipt of the money, God's representatives in the person of the holy fathers promised him: the grace of God, help in crisis and difficult situations from a guardian angel an unlimited number of times, the prayers of the saints for him and his loved ones before God - as needed. Having paid 10 rubles, the Omsk resident began to zealously fulfill the terms of the agreement: go to church, pray and repent, observe fasting, do not buy candles in other people’s churches, turn his right cheek after his left at the request of his neighbor, etc. In the end, as he calculated, About 400 bucks of sinful, but evergreen dollars annually and regularly dripped onto God’s deposit, but the other side was in no hurry to fulfill the terms of the agreement.

“Grace never happened, and to list the illnesses and misfortunes that befell me during this period would be a story,” writes Melnichenko. As a result, Vasily Melnichenko came to the conclusion that it was necessary to break off relations with such an dishonest partner and wrote a statement to Bastrykin, where he asks to conduct an audit of the activities of the Russian Orthodox Church at the time of fraud on the part of God, since, according to the charter of this religious office, it is the Russian Orthodox Church that is the official representative of the sinful earth.

According to the applicant, the audit should resolve the issue of the activities of the Russian Orthodox Church and God. “In the absence of such a being, I ask you to hold the leadership of the Orthodox Church accountable for fraudulent actions. If the existence of God is proven by your department, I ask you to check the Russian Orthodox Church for the legality of the activities of this organization as a representative,” the photographer asks the investigators.

In the meantime, the trial and the case, Russian students in elementary school have had their reading reduced. If previously the basic program included 3 reading lessons per week, now there are only two. The third lesson, according to officials, is simply vital for the new subject - “Fundamentals of Religious Cultures and Secular Ethics.” Last year, mathematics shared its hour with physical education...