Linor Goralik: five stories about blood

... Here, say, xenobiologist E. finds himself in a difficult family situation. His family has a house in the suburbs, old, but dear. And for many years an abnormal family has been living in it: an abnormal relative with his wife, also abnormal. Rather, normal, but heavy drinking and already, in general, abnormal. And the relative is also not very good. This family brought the house to such a state that even flies does not fly into it, they are afraid to pick up something. Well, of course, no mortgage payments have been made for a long time. And now the relatives of the xenobiologist E., having suffered and gnawing at his conscience, ultimately does what to do: sends this very family that they should leave the house from this day. But the sister of Xenobiologist E., the woman is intelligent and educated, worries the most, especially since there are two children in that family. And he decides to go there, talk, well, suddenly something can be said from what these people will take up the mind. Well, after all, well, how are we so, huh? Maybe we supported them little, for example. Rarely called for the New Year. They did not let them read their favorite books. Well, understandable. He comes, talks, talks about the spirit, about family duty, about their in vain waste potential, about parental duties. Standing says, it’s scary to sit, a earflaps lies on a stool, some life wanders in the earflaps, and this is July, by the way. It seems to be listened to her and in general. And the next day, a neighbor calls the site, says: Lena, what a good fellow you are. In the morning, he says, today an abnormal husband, completely sober and normal, drags crushed stone on the site, a hammer behind his belt, and a person has somehow transformed. An abnormal wife sits normally on the veranda, sews something, smiles quietly for herself, the children cheerfully run around (sober). In a word, the neighbor in the site says - well done you, Lena, should behave so an enlightened person in situations of ethical choice. And the sister of Xenobiologist E. is trying to persuade relatives to be given a chance, etc. But relatives, of course, are unshakable. And the bailiffs come on the due day, and Lena with them in the last hope to prove, convince, photograph the transformed people, etc. The house is empty. The well is covered with rubble. All the tiles in the bathroom are crushed with a hammer, carefully, in a square. The mop is tightly put into the fireplace pipe. And in every corner, on every windowsill, on the toilet cover, in a burned refrigerator, in the crushed cabinets there are Voodoo dolls caring with female hands. All in needles. And the sister of Xenobiologist E., to the horror of his brother, then for three months goes to the healer very famous among intelligent people, Ashram Georgievich, puts protection, makes spiritual exercises, calls in the evenings and screams at his brother, that he is a fool, that he does not protect himself, that if something happens to him, she will not survive this.

... Here, say, the artist K. says that at some point she woke up in a terrible state, in an unknown one, in the unknown one, whose bed is and in the unknown one, whose underpants. And I realized that it was time for her to settle down, dry and tie. And I went to my parents in Tula. Evening, tea, sofa, old -Soviet tenderness, television tedder. The presenter asks: “What animal Bible describes in the words:“ Here is his strength in his loins and his fortress in the muscles of his womb; he turns his tail like a cedar; his veins are interwoven on his hips; his legs are like copper pipes; he has bones like iron rods ”? “Stripper! - screaming from the couch the mother of the artist K. - Stripper! "

... Here, say, the architect P. finds out that both she and her groom do not want a traditional wedding with a cake, heels and a limousine, but they want to calmly spend a day with a watermelon, sneakers and horses. And, fortunately, the families of architect P. and her groom completely share their views and are very welcome. They find a pleasant place outside the city like a camp site - horses, barbecue, air, river, joy. The whole company arrives, a man of thirty, the administrator meets them, introduces them: then, then, Pavel, he will help you with everything that is for barbecue, and with horses, but Tanya, she will show where your houses, linen will give out bedding, well, understandable. And Pavel and Tanya meet everyone, help to scatter the backpacks of the house, word for word: what do you note? And we have a wedding, here is a bride in a white T -shirt, and in red sneakers - a groom. And after half an hour, everyone is already pouring beer and feed the horses with barbecue, and then Tanya and Pavel appear because of the nearest house. On Paul, a jacket instead of a sports jacket, and he leads a horse to a shirt, all in paper colors and with a white saddle, to which a bottle of champagne is tied with curled ribbons. And on Tan, a dress with sparkles, heels cling to the grass, but Tanya courageously carries a cake in front of him, bought in the nearest Selpo, and the horse is driven away from him. And Paul, taking it towards the groom, says: you, man, do not worry, this is from us, we will not put it on the expense. I also married without a penny of money, but the wedding is once in my life, it is necessary that beauty is, it is necessary to remember.

... Here, say, teacher A. tells friends that after thirty -six years and three divorces it became clear to her: the best that is in marriage is she.

... Here, say, a deeply religious poet Z. very hard to endure that his middle -aged parents stubbornly remain Soviet atheists of old hardening, and from time to time tried to conduct theological disputes with them. What are the disputes: these people live with the books of Zenon Kosidovsky, the poet Z. about Noah as a symbolic embodiment of the hope of a grain of good in every person, they are about how much a tyrannosaurus eats in a day. Poet Z. - about the fact that stories from Scripture is a window into the world of the past, present and future, they are about Pushkin, Gorky and Nodar Dumbadze. The poet Z. was even ready to come to terms with the fact that parents were looking at the first channel from morning to night, with all his disgust to this channel - he thought, maybe at least something would get from there; No, Krymnash Krymnash was a great country and we will be a great country, but this is all - this is obscurantism, in vain Putin contacted the priests. And here is the whole story with the Crimea and pensions. And the poet Z. calls Papa and affectionately says: “Dad, and dad ... There is such a story in the Scripture: the people of Israel were very depressed and began to lose faith, and Aaron went throughout the people and took away gold jewelry from all, and from them was distinguished by a large-large statue and put on the square as a symbol, you know, unity and power. And the people ta-a-a-a-Ak perked up! " And dad says to him: “Go to the ass, Zosya” - and hangs the phone.