Fish and Chicks (three love talks)

Natasha

The message came at night:
“I went out into the ice twilight. It was unbearable to remain. It's over. "
In the morning we meet for coffee.
Natasha is a spectacular brunette for thirty years. The eyes are red, swollen. Heavy dark hair is confused.
He drinks mineral water for a long time directly from the bottle.
Then he starts.

- I waited for him yesterday for two hours. On the street is cold. Snow. All froze. The day is still so gloomy, unpleasant. She sat in a coffee shop. The book was good with me. And now I'm sitting, sitting, sitting. And suddenly got angry. I thought that a man simply did not need to crush. What you need to be a modern woman. That it is necessary to accept it as he is, and then he himself will gradually change for the better. He recognizes me, loves, stops being late. I even began to hint him, a couple of times refused spontaneous dates, asked to set an exact date and time. He even seemed to give in to ...

- Well, what? Did you go home as a result?

-At some point, I decided what was needed. I got dressed, went out into the street, I go to the subway, and he leaves the car to meet me. I wanted to express everything to him. But then I thought that I did not want to be hysterical in his eyes. A modern woman should not behave like a hysteria. We have a date, we need to discuss plans for the New Year. Why will I have a scandal in the middle of the street? Am I a woman? Who will get better from this? Let's have dinner. At dinner I ask him if he had already bought tickets to Tel Aviv. I told you, he promised me a trip. He suddenly says: "You know, tickets are terribly expensive." I ask: how much? He says that for two there will be 54 thousand rubles. Do you imagine? He has real estate in Moscow, two cars, a high position, he constantly drives abroad! But I am uncomfortable, I do not want to seem to him mercantile. You know, I'm not mercantile at all. The other day, I only had only 200 rubles left before my salary, I sat on buckwheat, but I didn’t ask for anything. So, she hinted slightly that I only had 200 rubles for three days, and he very sympathized. He, in fact, is still very sensitive, thin of such a person ...

“So what did you tell him about tickets?”

“I said I would pay for my ticket.” Of course, we pay terribly at the institute. My salary is only 45 thousand, and I also rent an apartment. But still I tell him: “Dear, I will pay for myself. Of course, it will be hard for me to find 27 thousand, but I will find them. After all, I love you. After all, I want to spend time with you. " Then he hesitated, says that nothing would work out anyway. He said that he had only completed the repair in one of his apartments. You know, he is renting an apartment. In addition, I beat one of my cars a little. I say that I understand everything. Now, after all, the crisis, difficult times. And the New Year can be wonderful in Moscow. But he breaks again, mutters something, then he says that he needs to go to his mother in London. You know, his mother lives in London. I am surprised. I don't know how to react. "But what about me?" - I ask him. He says that then we will go with him then, that it just comes out. Here I can’t stand it. I tell him. I tell him everything. Everything that has long accumulated. I tell him that my relationship is not satisfied. That I want depths. That I need a life together.

- And what is he?

- He was surprised! He said that he was sure exactly the opposite - that I did not need anything like that. “You yourself told me! He shouted. - She myself told me that you are a free woman without prejudice! That you are modern and self -sufficient! That you do not set your goal of marriage! " Then I was horrified. Suddenly it turned out that we did not understand each other at all. I said that I do not want to marry. But I did not say that I did not need a life together! I can’t even be angry with him. After all, it turns out, I misled him. Lord, how poor ...

- Listen, well ...

- Wait. Then I told him that I was very sorry. She said that our relationship did not work out and that I will have to cut them off.

- And left?

- Not really. I sat. I waited for him to say. He did not say anything. Then his phone rang. His sister called. I called to visit. He agreed, warned that he would not come alone. I somehow immediately hung up here. The sister is a native person. Introduces a relative, so he still loves. I also thought that he was very responsive and caring in relation to loved ones. I immediately agreed to come. And I, apparently, is not very close to him, so he treats me like that. After all, we are only three months together ...

I could not stand it. I got up, dressed, went out into the corridor. I stood there. Then she returned to the room again, undressed, lay down.

“And you went to your sister with him?”

- Yes, we went to his sister with him. She has an apartment on Ostozhenka. Huge. I don’t even know how many apartments would fit. She is also divorced, but she has children. We sat in the kitchen. Opened wine. Everything was very nice. And suddenly, for some reason, he tells the story of how he drove some of his past girls abroad for the weekend. No, do you understand? Here, of course, I could not stand it. Besides, I drank. You know when I drink, I can’t stand it. I tell him: "But what about me?" I got up and said that I am very sorry that our relationship did not work out, that I was leaving, that it's over, that I was leaving this very minute, that he would never return me.

- And left?

- Yes, wait. I went out into the corridor. Standed. I think it will run now to return me. Will ask for forgiveness. And he does not go. I still stood. He does not go. I returned to the kitchen.

- As nothing happened?

- Listen, we are all intelligent people. They pretended that nothing happened. We talk again. We drink wine. And suddenly, for some reason, he tells the story of how he left 30 thousand from one of his past girls in a restaurant. Well, here I could not stand it at all. I got up, told him: “And me? But what about me? After all, I sat on buckwheat for three days! " I again told him that I was leaving him. And I wanted to leave, but then my sister screamed: “Stop parting in my kitchen! My children are sleeping behind the wall! " I was so surprised. So what, what children. Let them know how adults live. He brought me out. We got in a taxi. We came to his house. We went to bed.

- That is, how did you go to bed?

- Well, like all people. Lowed and lay down. I wanted to explain something to him, to start a conversation, but he suddenly hugged me tightly. So tight that I could not say anything. I almost could not even breathe. I thought he still loves me. That he does not want to let me go. And fell asleep. I slept very badly. Anxious. I woke up at seventh hour. He slept, turning away to the wall. I could not stand it. I realized that I can no longer suffer from an unknown. I pushed him and demanded an explanation. He asked: “Well, what are you? Well, what explanations do you need? What are your questions? " I tell him: “I have only two questions. I want to know: will you give me a deep relationship and life together? And I also want to know: why didn’t you rush after me in the corridor and returned me when I said that I was leaving? ” He stared at me. Then suddenly lay down and turned away. I could not stand it. I got up, dressed, went out into the corridor. I stood there. Then she returned to the room again, undressed, lay down. Then she pushed him again and demanded the answers to two of my questions, but he again turned away to the wall. Then I got up again, dressed, went out into the corridor. I stood there. Then she returned.

- Natasha!
- And here everything is. I kissed him on the cheek and told him that I was very sorry that our relationship did not work out.
- And then you ...
- Yes, here I left him.

We were a little silent. We looked out the window where passers -by kneaded their feet with dirty and wet November snow. I wanted to say something comforting. She even opened her mouth. But Natasha was getting ahead.

“You know,” she said, “now I can’t get rid of guilt.” After all, he probably is now worried there. After all, I left him. Lord, how poor.

Talk with editor (Telegram)

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:11]
Briefly speaking. K. made an appointment in one fashionable bar. I come. He sits there in a separate room at a round table with a man and a woman. A man is a famous composer, a woman is a singer and a long -term mistress of a famous composer. We are sitting, talking about some nonsense. The singer suddenly begins to sob. Everything is horrified. K. asks her what was the matter. She cries, hiccups and cannot speak. Finally says:
“I can't live with him.” He is a terrible person. He is cheating on me.

The famous composer blushes and lowers his eyes into a glass.

She:
- He sleeps with this young fool. And with another. Well, he would just sleep with them and said that he has me. But he does not tell them that he has me. He tells them that I am not. That is, he doesn’t tell them anything about me!

The famous composer sighs and mutters:
- Lyudochka, well, this is not true. I say, I say.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:14]
K. finally can’t stand it and begins to scold both of them. He scolds the singer for the fact that she could not come to terms with the fact that the famous composer is cheating on her for 12 years. He scolds the famous composer for the fact that he is fat.

- You both need to pull yourself together! Luda, you need to get your lover. Alexey (the name of the famous composer is), you need to go to the gym!

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:14]
I drink wine.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:16]
But then it flies to me. “Here I am, for example, look at me,” says K. “This is a frenzy, I write to her, she answers me on Facebook with difficulty (here I wanted to notice that I was just very timid when he writes to me, but I was scanned and said nothing). But I allow the frenzy to live the way she wants! I allow her not to answer me! She is a terrible person, this frenzy, but I accept her like that. You must do that too! "

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:17]
I drink wine.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:20]
K. suddenly says that Mayakovsky will come now. No one is surprised, so I'm not surprised either. The singer cries for some time, then she hugs everyone and leaves very pleased. Suddenly Mayakovsky comes. No, Mayakovsky really comes - a man with a large, outstanding jaw and bare skull. It has a green sweater and butterfly. He begins to read Mayakovsky's poems.

- He sleeps with this young fool. And with another. Well, he would just sleep with them and said that he has me. But he does not tell them that he has me. - Lyudochka, well, this is not true. I say, I say.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:21]
I drink wine.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:22]
Finally, Mayakovsky calms down, sits down at the table, tells a couple of funny stories, then leaves and returns with some kind of Georgian. “This is my brother,” he says. “Brother and partner.” No one is surprised, and I am not surprised either. Mayakovsky orders all vodka.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:26]
Finally, something begins to clear up: K. in a whisper explains to me that a person who looks like Mayakovsky is a former husband of one very famous actress. He was the director and wanted to make a film about Mayakovsky with a famous actress in the role of Lily Brik, but the film was not finished, because at first he married her, and then divorced her. He cannot finish the film and stop being Mayakovsky either.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:27]
But that's not all. It turns out that the famous composer also wrote the opera about Mayakovsky. And he also wanted a famous actress to be in the title role. But the famous actress refused him because she married a director, similar to Mayakovsky, and agreed to play Lily Brik in his film about Mayakovsky.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:28]
As a result, the film will be unfinished, the opera is not delivered, the famous actress does not play anyone, and the director and composer drink vodka together.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:29]
Finally they all went to another famous actress who had a birthday. And I went home. What a pity that K. he saw so little.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:31]
I am all trying to tell you why I didn’t finish the text for the deadline.

Olga Beshley [09/27/16, 23:32]
I got drunk in the subway food. Crap.

My fish

I'm sitting in an almost empty bar. Betray -day evening. I don't want to go home. I read at the bar. Suddenly burst into tears.

A full man in a blue shirt, in an unleashed tie, gets away from his chair, asks Barten with still whiskey and also drags himself on a chair next to me.

-Why are you crying? Ah, I know. All women cry because of men. Probably someone left.

- No, I ...

But what kind of people, right? What kind of epic ******? To steal fish! They are wordless creatures. How is it possible?

- Come on, what. It's not a shame. Three wives left me. And I'm nothing. After the second divorce, I lost 15 kilograms. It is useful to me. The doctor said: "Divorce benefited you." I generally think - a divorce for everyone to benefit. Updating life. Health of the body. People - they will cling to each other and let's suck the blood. This is me not only about women. Guys are also vampire. You can’t just survive in another way. You know, our life is hard. We live in such a country. My boss is the brain ****, and then I torment my wife. And what's the boss? Everything is difficult for him too. There are no budgets, a crisis, checks, they are planted around everyone. And then you carry it to the family. Sometimes it seems - it is better for people not to converge at all. That's the point of fish. I am fish and in general all this water living creature - I love, I can’t. All likes: sharks, seals, slopes, penguins. Even corals. Have you been to the oaks? Well, how not. Well, like that. At least straighten you, or something. There is such an oceanarium - in! Here, no, here, here. Huge! The largest in the world. I have an oceanarium - this is a dream. All my life I dream of building the largest oceanarium in Russia in Russia. Do you generally know what the oceanarium is? This is when there is water, and here is water, and everywhere water, and you are standing, covered with a thickness, and nothing. And nothing to you! And the fish around are floating. I even wanted to leave my office in such a project - to build an oceanarium on the island of Russian. And it did not work out. But, you know, when criminal cases went there, scandals, theft, I thought to myself: "The Lord took it." But what kind of people, right? What kind of epic ******? To steal fish! They are wordless creatures. How is it possible? In general, I am glad that I did not participate in this.

- Where are you working?

- Well, let's say so, my work, in principle, is also about fish. But our department is engaged in all kinds of searches. Very boring. These are all the distributions of catches. I don't like the word "catch". I don’t like that they are caught and killed. I don’t even eat fish myself. You see how fate is developing: I like living fish, but I am more and more dead. But a person is happy only when he has a favorite thing. But in general, I think that someday, after many years, I will still build an oceanarium. Children will go there. Maybe even my children will go there. And so we will stand there, and around the water and fish are floating. I will be very happy then. And now you just need to live and work where you can. Because so adults live. That's where the tragedy, right? And you are crying because of a man.

I wanted to tell him that it was not a matter of a man, but just a Chekhov “bishop” read, but instead asked about fish. Shark, if she lacks air, it turns out that it can partially turn off the brain.

Author-Deputy editor-in-chief of the Internet publication Rus2web

Read the previous stories of Olga Beshley:

"Angels, demons, father Alexander and also me"
"Last House"
"Return of Saturn"
"Birthday"
"Master"
"Latvian"