Consumption Society

“Everyone who consumes heroin regularly looks younger than his years. Heroin retains, mummifies the person. Inside, everything rot, but there is no outside,” says Ali, who really looks much younger than his 46 years.

They ask not to use the word "drug addict", preferring "drug addict" or "drug -consumer". But they often get down and pronounce it themselves.

They tell their stories: how they are dependent, how they tried to get rid of it, how they moved to Germany, where they received replacement therapy. Russian-speaking immigrants from the former republics of the USSR, now they are gathering on Saturdays in Berlin in the premises of the Society of HIV-infected help and tell each other how the week passed. All of them are carriers of HIV and hepatitis. Many served mainly short terms. In the past, they have the experience of humiliation and betrayal, breaking and overdose, death of friends, crime, breaking relations with loved ones, persecution by the authorities and the lack of proper medical care.

While none of them managed to fully integrate into German society, some, despite replacement therapy, still use drugs, someone lives on the street. But many have become volunteers of charitable projects, try to help other drug users. And, it seems, for the first time in a long time they began to dream of a better life.

The stories and dreams of drug addicts are in the film by Julia Vishnevetskaya and Valentina Baryshnikov “Consumption Society”.

The Berlun group includes immigrants from Russia, Ukraine, Latvia, Estonia, Moldova, Belarus. In Germany, they received high -quality medical care and replacement therapy - in most former Soviet republics it is difficult to get such treatment, and in Russia it is completely prohibited.

Moving to Germany for many was a salvation: the coordinator of the Larisa group fled from Kaliningrad, where she was threatened for 20 years in prison of an unjust, according to her, charges of drug trafficking; Andrei left Chernigov when he was going to amputate his leg; Mikhail was on the verge of death in a hospital in Minsk, Tatyana "came to Berlin to die", and now Berlun participants say that their goal is to "return the right to life and dignity to people, to change the punitive paradigm of drug policy" in their countries.

The history of hitting dependence is very different. Sveta, from Ukraine, tells how her own uncle with deceit sold her to Turkey: "He said that I would go to work as a waitress at the hotel. But they sold me as a prostitute in a closed institution. I was 17 years old, I was very afraid. People were associated with the mafia." And then one girl "put" her on drugs, saying that this will help to overcome difficulties because of the need to sleep with different men. From the "closed establishment" of Light in the end ran, jumping from the second floor. But getting rid of drug addiction so simply did not work.

Misha, who grew up in Belarus, describes a childhood successful at first: “He studied well at school, fencing, six training in a week. 1995, his father was engaged in business, got money. Bandits, extortion, beating. Bins. Parents had to sell an apartment, leave for the other end of the city, a terrible area.” Sport Misha abandoned and tried drugs: “I loved to read, good music. But this was not interested in a new circle of communication, new classmates. They showed me:“ Do you want to try? ”And after half an hour they bought it in a neighboring house. I tried to enter the institute, I did not enter the exams.” Then Misha found HIV and hepatitis. "It seemed to me that everything that I could have broken. That I have no children, I would not live to retire. I lived one day, did not make plans." He was put in the hospital: “They didn’t let me sleep so that I didn’t die.” “Misha, don’t sleep,” the nurses said. Fatigue, I just turned back to the wall. I was not even scared, I just wanted to relax. ” He left the hospital and began to wait for good therapy. In the end, Misha found her in Germany: “He arrived, asked for help as a refugee. He explained that they don’t give me medicines, that they are being persecuted there as a drug addict. I want to become a social worker, I want to go to the states, I have been drawn since I have read“ one -story America ”by Ilf and Petrov.”

The story of Ali who came to Germany from Latvia

After school [engaged] music, I had my own group. I was a vocalist. Punk, hardcore.

I saw that my parents on weekends or holidays will gather a company, drink. But they did not depend on this. I thought the same drugs. They took it for the weekend, pricked or smoked - and that’s all, you live on.

The poppy grows like a weed. And at that time, this is the very beginning of the 90s, there wasn’t even such propaganda even on television, people knew nothing, you could just go to the garden, ask: "Oh, granny, you have weeds there, can we pick them up?" - "Why do you, boys?" - "We need us." - "Take, of course."

After school, I entered the navigation school, one course was unlearned there. He came and took the documents, because at 17 I already started to use, went and went, I was no longer up to study. And the sailor is still not a vocational school, there it was necessary to study seriously there. I just realized myself that I would not pull.

This is such a thing as a grain in the ground was put in the ground, they also planted a grain in the brain: if I tried it once, then everything has gone through

I remember lying at home, I was spinning like a screw, all my arms, legs twisted. I am in tears, in squirrels, in saliva, in sweat, I can no longer. Mom walked around me: "What is the matter with you?" I say: "Mom, I got sick, I am very bad." - "Let me call an ambulance." - "Do not have an ambulance." Then she: "That's it, I can’t look at you anymore, I will call an ambulance now." I then shouted: "Mom, what an ambulance, you do not understand, I do not get sick, it breaks me." She grabbed her head: how, my son is a drug addict. It was a nightmare. Then I thought that mom would say: you are no longer a son. But she, on the contrary, - I did not expect this, - I sat with me for three or four days, did not leave my bed when I could not get up, I rushed, she wore a bucket, changed. Then I realized that there is no other person closer and dearer than the mother of another person, that she did not leave me in this situation. She saved me just then.

I thought that I would never touch this in my life. But this is such a thing as a grain was put in the ground, they also planted a grain in the brain: if I tried it once, then everything has spread.

I met a girl in Riga, we met at one time. Then there was a child, at first our son was born, then a daughter. Then there was a period when I did not use. But then he began again. I lived at her house in Riga, she has an apartment, she lived with her parents. I lived with father -in -law and mother -in -law. Slowly, a little bit, once, the second time, the third-again hooked, began to use. Things began to disappear from the house, the money from parents. It ended that I was fired from this family.

True, I do not remember what I had in my life for several years. Somehow everything is in the fog, like some snatches of sleep.

At any second, it can click, a stressful situation, some problems, you don’t see a way out-the first thing that comes to mind: you have to get a bit, you need to take something to prick. I tried once - it's like a tattoo for life, it is already sitting in the brain.

I don’t even think about it, even such a thought is not close. I am going, I meet some friend, which, apparently, is the pupils to the point. And immediately click: you also need to take it.

I do not remember for several years for several years what I had in my life

You wake up in the morning, if you have something to heal, you are healed, [but] you understand perfectly that in a few hours you will be bad. You immediately begin to break something, look, money or what to sell. All day in this.

I had three friends, [one] could not stand the body from him, two people hanged themselves. One such was Yura Funfir, he had a very beautiful girl, I really liked her. I all thought: what did she find in him? Such a cool girl. He had a close relationship with her, but he so hooked on heroin, he realized that he could never get off this needle. He wrote a note: "I do not want to spoil your life, I can no longer get off, but you do not need it, I will ruin only life to you." And pulled up. And the second hanged himself when he found out that he had AIDS. I passed the tests for AIDS, the tests showed a positive result, also got up. Honestly, this, of course, they made more stupidity.

When I was here [in Germany] stayed on the street, I began to use daily, regularly, then several times a day, then into this hole deeper and deeper. I would not get out of her. It saved me that I got sick, fell into a coma, someone picked me up on the street, brought me to the hospital. After a coma, I only woke up in the hospital, they put me on my feet.

I sometimes take once a month, once every two months. I have no addiction, I stand on the program, I get replacement therapy. [But] it sits in my head.

Today, by the way, my son is 17 years old. The last time I saw him when he was two and a half years old. The wife will definitely not make contact. But I hope someday son, even now at this age he will already begin to ask questions. Firstly, he has my last name. He will someday ask his mother, but what kind of last name is my father.

I had everything in my life. I had a family, I have children. If now I will die - I think that I have lived life for nothing in vain. I tried everything.

I work as a volunteer, and it is so nice when you know that you live for a reason, not in vain, not in vain. And it is thanks to this that I am sure: I can live without drugs when there is something to do when you benefit.