"Like a flower"

Inge is as long as 13 years, but it is more like a teenager, but a small child. Inga does not talk at all, does not walk herself and does not know how much. What's the reason - does not seem to know, no one

We help the prospects to help

"Here is such a state of affairs"

While we are talking with Olga, Inga’s mother, in the video, Inga and her younger brothers are sleeping in the next room - they have a quiet hour after a walk. Inge really likes to walk, although on her own she cannot even just get up from a chair. And when she has no mood for going out into the street, she listens to her favorite audio shows and plays with a rattle.

Olga photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

Inga's mother is the first child. Olga gave birth to her in a good paid maternity hospital, so that everything was for sure. At first it seemed that it was so. On the Apgar scale, Inga set 8-9 out of 10 points, she passed all the examinations with success, the doctors did not suspect any pathologies. It is now, having given birth to two more children, Olga understands: the problems were from the very beginning.

“Perhaps there was something in childbirth: I don’t remember, for example, to be the first scream, and this is usually remembered,” Olga says. -In addition, Inga’s skin was not pink, but grayish-green. She perceived vaccinations very poorly, although they were given admission to them an immunologist in a paid center under the hospital and a doctor in a clinic. I think they did not notice something after all-or did not attach importance. There were also constantly problems with the chair, she cried a lot, difficult to calm down. And somewhere in the fourth month it became obvious that something was wrong with the child, we ran to hospitals. At first, she was organized (organic defeat of the central nervous system. - approx. CC ) and the forecast was good, but in the end the story received a sad continuation. By the year, she could not yet. She sat [at the age] of about two and a half years only. ”

Olga with the children - Inga, Yegor and Grisha photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

Inga developed very slowly. She is still very small in stature, she does not know how to talk, but walks, only holding his hand. Why such a delay arose, doctors still do not understand. Olga says that none of the diagnoses made over all these years can explain what is happening with her daughter.

“When we come to some next new doctor, he looks at the papers-I have a thick pack, the folder is huge, everything is filed,” says Olga. - He looks at the papers, looks at the child, says: “I don’t understand, you have nothing in your papers that explains this state of affairs.” And this says every new doctor who sees it, nothing was found that would explain at least part of the problems. Let not all, but at least part. Therefore, we grow just like a flower. ”

"I began to really rejoice"

The first few years Olga and Inga practically did not stop the search for the cause of developmental delay - they constantly consulted with doctors, lay in hospitals, went to sanatoriums and rehabilitation centers, went to massages, tried a variety of approaches and methods. Inga then was so tired of the constant presence of doctors that then she was afraid of people in robes for a long time and began to cry at every appearance.

Inga has children's cerebral paralysis, severe multiple developmental disorders, allergies to gluten. Inga was born on time with a high score on the Apgar scale - and her mother believes that it was a melting photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD Inga needs full care. It must be driven, plant, lay, change clothes, wash, change diapers. Inga herself can only be a spoon - the years of training photo are gone: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD Inga photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

“Now I am very sorry about this time, because our classical rehabilitation system in the ingina was not at all, in a sense, it even harmed,” says Olga. - Because all through tears, through screams, through resistance. But we did not have any physical problems that I would have to fight directly. If I then knew about other methods, more modern ones would probably be easier for a child. I don’t know what it would give in her development, maybe nothing, but at least her life would be filled with positive impressions, rehabilitation would not become for her [as if] a red rag for a bull. ”

Rehabilitation and significant physical changes did not bring: Inga still developed slowly, and it seemed that life was a vicious circle. Until eight years ago, “prospects” appeared in her life-a charitable organization that supports families with children with disabilities.

Mom dreams that Inga recovered, although he understands that this is impossible photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

“In the“ prospects ”I first saw a human attitude to such children,” says Olga with eyes wet from tears. -I will not say that they were poorly treated in the garden or somewhere else. But there they were always condescending to them, but here it is not. This is the feeling that children are perceived as equal, despite all their restrictions, this, of course, is a completely amazing thing. And in fact, there were probably the first holidays when I celebrated. I always sob on children's holidays, I turn on this mechanism when I think: here, but my child will never sing, never daces ... And from the moment when I got to the “prospects” holidays, I began to really rejoice, look at it differently. ”

"There was no such thing before"

By the time of acquaintance with the "prospects" Olga and Inga especially needed support. They remained together - Ingin dad left when the daughter was not even two. Until now, it helps financially, but Ingu has not seen for many years: he lives in another city. The prospects were very useful. Inga began to regularly visit the center of the organization’s daytime stay, remained in the guest house when Olga gave birth to her second son, and then, when he was very small, and went to the summer camp several more times.

Olga leads a group on the VKontakte social network “Poems from Laughter” and dreams of devoting more time to this - this brings her little money and a lot of joy photos: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD In order for Inga to eat a spoon herself, it was necessary to train for many years photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

“It was for me some kind of cultural shock when I found out that they were taken out to the camp of such children,” Olga laughs. - They are always treated as helpless, protect from everything from what only possible. And the guys take them out of town, they sleep in tents, eat hiking food by the fire! And this is almost the only time when I have been without a child for several days in a row. ”

Of course, the “prospects” do not work miracles and the state of Inga remains complex, but modern methods that employees and volunteers use to help children, and, most importantly, the human attitude allows Ingge to feel better, focusing attention and acquire new skills. Olga says that with minimal external changes, her daughter became different inside. For a long time, she very poorly made contact with new people, she was focused on herself and detached. And now everything is different.

Inga considers the book photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

“She became calmer, more contact, became a more open world. She calmly now belongs to new people, new places. She did not love all this, screamed, resisted. And now he hangs out with pleasure, loves when people come, when volunteers come with her to work out, touch everyone, strokes her hair, feels his beards, says Olga with a smile. “Previously, this was not the case, before all the trips were accompanied by negative and stress.”

The Pandemia of Coronavirus made its own adjustments to the life of the family: they spent the first month of self-isolation at the state cottage for children with disabilities near St. Petersburg and encountered unexpected problems there. Olgin’s husband remained in the city at that time, because his work involves contacts with a large number of people, and they decided not to see each other, they were afraid for the children. But Olga could not leave them to just go to the store - and the products came to an end.

“We just resolved this issue, and then“ prospects ”call me and say:“ Listen, do you need anything? ” I say: oh, we need everything! - laughs Olga. - And the guys brought me foods, diapers, antiseptics several times, which I still have not ended, gloves, masks. And so I realized that I was released, I realized that there are people who will come and help, solve problems that we cannot solve among themselves. And this, of course, is amazing - when there is a feeling that you are supported, that there is where to go. "

Inga photo: Tatyana Tkacheva for TD

It is simply impossible to overestimate the support that the “prospects” provide for dozens of St. Petersburg families with children with disabilities. For Olga and many other parents, employees of the organization become not only assistants, but also real friends, who can always be addressed in a difficult situation, knowing that they will certainly support and ask for anything in return.

And you and I should help the “prospects” themselves, which have been working exclusively thanks to the donations of indifferent people for a quarter century. Now, when everyone around is busy with their own problems, charitable organizations are in a particularly difficult situation, although often they are the first to come to the rescue. Please arrange a regular donation in favor of the "prospects", even the most modest amount will help to more confidently look at the future and plan work.