Former Belarusian political prisoner Natalya Hershe shares his experience with the Russians

Natalia Hershe was born in Belarus, in Orsha. 15 years ago she moved to live in Switzerland, received Swiss citizenship, but, as soon as in 2020, protests began in Belarus, flew to Minsk. Natalia is thin, light. With other Belarusian women, she participated in a peaceful “female march”. The riot police, who arrested her, simply tore Natalia from the ground and carried it. She tried to pull off the riot police Balaklava. For this, after three months, the Belarusian court sentenced her to 2.5 years in prison.

In prison Natalia, as her brother Gennady said, was broken. But they did not break. She announced a hunger strike four times, refused to sew a uniform for the police and the army, she was punished, throwing herself in a schizo, she was deprived of letters, she was not provided with the necessary medical care, and she was not allowed to sleep. At the same time, they persuaded to sign a pardon. Not signed. Switzerland fought for her citizen as best she could. As a result, on February 18 (after 17 months of prison) the heroine of the Belarusian resistance Natalia Hershe was ahead of schedule. And six days later, the “special operation” began. We tried to rethink her experience in this new, nightmare context.

What is scary

- It’s not scary that we will be taken away and we will spend 15-30 days (now, maybe more) in dungeons. And it’s scary that when something was required of you-to say your opinion, show your personal position, not be afraid-you will not do it and then you will live with it. Well, they will arrest. Well, sit. We eat prison food.

If every person who feels responsibility, indignation, wanting to stop what is happening, will show this to others - he will support others and will move others to the same step. Let hundreds of thousands sit in prison - they are unlikely to find so much space in prisons to put the whole people. One person can do not. But even the fact that he took a place in prison for 15-30 days is already a feat.

How we dispersed

- I still think: how? People went to the same school, studied according to the same textbooks, why did we part in such different directions?

Why does a person perceive reality so? Or does he absolutely trust the authorities? Or does not want to understand this issue deeper? Or is it so easier for him? Apparently, these are the features of each person. Does he agree with how this information is provided to him or wants to know something more? What drives them? Your personal calm? And the other person wants to know the truth. From her, he can be poorly moral, spiritually. And then he feels the need to express it. And he goes outside. And he is worthy of admiration. Especially if he is alone, if there are few of them. This is even more valuable.

Where are the causes and foundations of what is happening

- After a schizo (this is a punishment cell), I was transferred to PCT (chamber type). It was in a colony in Gomel. PCT is some relief of the regime compared to the cinker: at night they give a mattress, pillow, blanket, but most importantly - I have the opportunity to use the library. It was a paradise for me. It was at that time that I read Solzhenitsyn's “Gulag Archipelago”. I am very ashamed that I read it for the first time at this age (I'm 52 now), but I thought: this is the reason why I had to sit down.

This book excited me very much, I recognized myself in it, I recognized them. I completely agree with the opinion of Solzhenitsyn that society needs to process all these mistakes. And in our country, this period takes at least 100 years (since the revolution) - a period that has not been considered, conclusions were not drawn. This is the only way to society. And only when society rethinks this, when it condemns violence, terror, which, in principle, should no longer be in the 21st century, then we can hope for the revival of a new society.

I was very happy for Ukraine when they went along the democratic path. And now it’s very sad. Every state, it seemed, can count on independence, and the people have the right to choose their own path.

Without which there is no dictatorship

- What I fought in Belarusian prisons is a lie and falsification. This is the main one there - without this, the dictatorship does not exist. This is present there everywhere. That which I can't stand. When I was imprisoned, I was outraged to the core. And so she decided to confront. And she wrote a statement that from now on I feel obligated to fight with the whole lie in all places of my location. Which I did. It was in Minsk, and in Gomel, and in Mogilev - in all my prisons.

For example, a petition for pardon - this was contrary to my common position in life. I am a person who does not accept lies, had to agree with her and slander herself, signing this petition for pardon? No, I could not. Although it was not easy.

Of course, I wanted, of course, of course! But not at any cost!

At that time I read Solzhenitsyn: even in those days it was that the system demanded from people who were illegally put in camps for 10-15 years, to sign these petitions about pardon. And then they signed, this is understandable. And now I thought: well, no one kills you. Yes, the conditions were terrible. And physically I feel it now, the consequences remained.

What drives them

- They are all different. Everyone has their own reasons. But here is what I noticed: the higher a person takes a position, the more his brain is washed, the more he is sure that all this is right. And if there are doubts, then a person holds on to the place of work, for the opportunity to receive income. A person needs to feed his family, he receives a salary from the regime. And there are such selfless, so zealous in protecting the regime that it becomes scary. There was one boss in prison, who, with my form, was especially nervous. If he came to my camera, he was shaking directly. I accused me that I had left, left Belarus, and he was here, he is a patriot, he would not give it to anyone.

Have to speak with them

- Among my friends in Orsha, everyone supports the current policy. They say that they are not for Lukashenko, they are against it, but they do not want in Ukraine. So they told me before my arrest. But then, too, they wrote letters to me in jail. And all about the same that they do not want in Ukraine. Now, when I was released, I went to their tape. Everything is pro -Russian, for Putin. I still have no time to communicate with each of them. But I created a note in classmates: “Friends supporting Putin and Lukashenko, what are you so inactive? I can't hear you? Where are your arguments justifying the horror of what is happening in Ukraine? Are you afraid? Are you silent? Do you just agree with everything? Know you are to blame for what is happening. ”

I noted 30 of my friends in this note. But everyone was silent.

I will continue attempts to reach them. I will answer everyone.

That the main thing is on earth

- I have in related circles there are those who take propaganda for the truth. Even despite the fact that I was imprisoned. I don't know how possible. That is, they worry about me - how bad it is to me in prison, and on the other hand, they agree with all the actions of the government, with which I am fighting. It very surprises me. How to relate to them?

When I sat in Mogilev and got the opportunity to read, I also read a lot of spiritual literature. And these books everywhere say: the most important feeling on Earth is love. Love at different levels. And even if a person - in his cowardice, for the sake of material wealth, fearing to lose comfort, not being smart enough - chooses what is easier in this situation, if he does not want to look at the root of the issue, at the reasons, it is still a person, this is the creation of God. It must be loved. And I can not discard such people, including my relatives. I will continue to explain.

How to maintain dignity

- When I was sitting in Gomel, we still sewed work clothes. I was put in a place where they saw me very well through the observation camera. I took the cardboard and wrote in capital letters: "Mrs. Hershe went to the toilet." And each time she put it when she left the workplace. It seemed to me that I touched them a little. At first they were indignant, what kind of recording?! And then they got used to it.

Do I need to compromise

- In the Gomel colony I was deprived of letters. For 10 days I kept a hunger strike, protesting against it. Having not achieved any result, I decided: I am not an enemy to my health. Receiving letters - it was very pleasant to read them and just hold them in my hands ... But I said to myself: you should understand that many support you, you must feel it firmly without documentary evidence in your hands. And she took off the hunger strike.

Or another example. My brigade in prison sewed clothes for construction organizations - robe, pants. I sewed. By the way, I liked to sew, I liked the process, and they praised me, and I was pleased. Then I sewed bags for finished products. And then they gave them a form for the guards. And I refused. I understood that the Kardzer could not be avoided, but refused. That is, I went to meet them-I sewed the robe. But not form. Here is my compromise.

How not to break

- There was enough moral forces in me. I knew exactly what I want, what I do not want. I told them: you, in principle, cannot punish me. Although I can’t name the conditions for staying in a schizo otherwise than torture. For the first time, I did not even know that this is a schizo from itself at all. In the rules I read that if I feel the slightest physical malaise, then, supposedly, by decision of the doctor, I can be transferred to the medical unit. It reassured me. And when I specifically felt pain there on the ninth day (in my knees and fingers), but no help ... I received treatment only on the 21st day. And then this happened on my initiative when I just escaped from work at the medical unit. Then I was scared.

There were still torture - not to give sleep. Especially like no one did this, but the conditions were created such that I could not sleep. From the cold. Not a single warm thing. On wooden bunks. That's why

After sleepless nights on the fifth day, I just fell from the stool to the floor - falling asleep. She broke her head into the blood.

All this was recorded on the video recorder. The medical workers immediately came running, they were surprised. And I say that they do not let sleep during the day if you bowed your head, sitting, immediately knock on the door. And at night it is impossible to sleep from the cold.

Then they asked me: “But if you suffered so much, then why didn’t you stop holding a position not to sew a form?” And I thought: if I agree to sew now, it will turn out that the schizo influenced me. Everything is logical: we put her in a schizo, she was frightened for her health and now sews shape. And for what is all? I realized: I cannot abandon my position. Even through pain.

Do you need to regret it

- I do not regret anything. There is no hatred either. Even to those people who caused all this, such as the “victim” riot police. It was all worth it. Otherwise, how? Just go to work and pretend that everything is fine with me?