To bury the deceased father. Daughter cannot return the body for nine months

Since January 2023, a resident of the Guards District of the Kaliningrad Region, 30-year-old Ekaterina Matvienko has been trying to bury his father Andrei Matvienko, who died in the war in Ukraine. However, she cannot get his body: his father went to the front not from the Kaliningrad region, but from the DPR, and the Kaliningrad military enlistment office refuses to help her. Catherine told the North. Real to the correspondent, how the requisitions flourish at the front line and that hundreds of Russian and residents of the DPR died at the front, there was no place in the morgues and their bodies rot on the street.

Catherine's parents have long been divorced: she lived with the now deceased mother in a small village in the Kaliningrad region ( the name of the village is known for the editorial office, but at the request of Catherine we do not publish it. - SR ). Her father Andrei Matvienko left for the DPR several years ago to look after his mother.

- When the war began, he went to the military enlistment office himself. And in June 2022 he was at the front line. He was given an assault rifle with a crooked muzzle. He shot. On June 22, he was still in part, and on the 24th he already had the first combat exit. He was thrown onto the front of the crooked barrel of the machine gun. Cartridges - few, at the expense. Not enough - you will collect from the battlefield, my father said. There was no body armor, we ourselves searched and bought. There were no helmets either. They also bought it themselves. I could not send this by mail, because in the "DPR" and "LPR" of the Russian Post Department were closed. I transferred it through our mobilized ones, somewhere I just sent money to buy, ”says Ekaterina.

From time to time I called up with my father. He said that everything was fine with him, reassured her as best he could.

- The colleagues after his death told how it was. My father was without provisions for two weeks. They drowned snow in winter to at least somehow live. In a snowdrift, they slept under the bush. They have two people froze to death, one died of hunger. This is how they fought. I did not know that. As a normal father, he always told me that everything is fine, everyone is fed, eat, eat medications. God forbid, if they were given one or two soups to the brigade. They ate what they bought for themselves, ”says Catherine.

The last time they called up a week before the New Year.

- On December 24, my father called me and said directly: "I am leaving and, most likely, I will not return: we are sent to slaughter." My hysteria immediately began. On January 7, I was informed that he died, ”recalls Catherine. - After I found out that his brigade was sent for intelligence by battle in the Yasinovatsky district. They rode on the BRA unlawed. They were thrown to death.

Catherine believes that her father was not by chance in that battle.

- When the Russian servicemen paid 200 thousand rubles, my father received 78. Of these, eight combat outputs - each eight thousand. When they received a salary, there were requisitions. The minimum began from 10 thousand: for the needs of the part, for the needs of the company. And who did not give this money, they threw them at the front. The first time for a week. The week passed - they also offered to pass, but 5-10 thousand more. You don’t give up - you go to the front of the second time for two weeks. And I am inclined to the fact that those who were not silent were simply removed, ”Ekaterina suggests.

The company told Catherine that her father was torn away and it was impossible to take him off the battlefield, because this territory is controlled by the Armed Forces of Ukraine. She continued to believe that he was alive, was captured or lies with a shelter in the hospital.

- For nine months I am in hell. In hell I can’t get out of. I went to the morgues, by video, I tried to identify in the presence of a military commandant’s office. I reviewed so much the bodies that God forbid. And not only bodies, because for four and a half months the bodies were already disguised. I began to insist on the analysis of DNA, so that, God forbid, not to be mistaken and not to pick up someone else. I want to make sure that it is he, so that if you bury it, then bury my father.

The fact that Catherine is looking for her father quickly recognized scammers. Since then, they overcome her with phone calls and messages.

- They called, said that he was captured. The first question is the call sign? They do not know the call sign. Special signs? Do not know. The elementary question is for those who said that they have it: how many grandchildren have my father? They sent a photograph of supposedly my father from the hospital with a bloodied head. At first I even believed that it was he. There were calls where someone says: “I am alive,” and then the connection is interrupted, and the message comes: translate five thousand, because the connection is allegedly expensive. They called me from the video. Dark, someone says in a whisper. Then it is interrupted - and also immediately ask for money. Allegedly, this is my father in serious condition somewhere in the basement. The fortunetellers called me and shamans. If not for my ex -husband, I do not know how much I would pay. This is not one hundred thousand would be. I understood everything with a good mind, but somewhere I wanted to believe that he was alive. At first they just ask, then they begin to crush morally. For example, they called, said that his father is a deserter. If you tell them that they are ready to send money, they begin to rush you, they say that this should be done right now, ”says Catherine.

She tried to find out about the fate of her father through official structures - she called the Ministry of Defense the hotline, went to the military enlistment office in her area. She understood that it was necessary to look for a father primarily among the dead, not the living. To do this, you need to make a DNA expertise, given that the body lay on the battlefield for several months.

- When I turned to the military commissariat at the place of residence ( Kaliningrad region ) and explained that I need to hand over the DNA, they looked at me as an idiot. They say: this is not our mobilized one you want. I to him: I want to pick up my father. The commissar turned to me and said: "Well, you are all those here because of money." Yes, take the money to yourself, give me a father! - Catherine is indignant.

"My father is a worked out material"

On May 10, in the telegram channel, which publishes special signs of bodies in the Rostov morgue, Catherine recognized her father-he had an atypical thumb after the operation. When she contacted the volunteers, it turned out that yes, with a high degree of probability it was he. Andrei Matvienko lay on the battlefield for four and a half months before he was brought to the morgue.

- Russian troops are taken in zinc and if the body is disguised, then in zinc and buried. And from the "DPR" and "LPR" - God forbid, if it is just a coffin. And he is wooden, without upholstery. And then they simply give out in a bag or on a sheet ... Imagine, the body lies six months. In the morgue, without a refrigerator. They lie on the street, not in the building. These are not our civilian morgues. They lie, roughly speaking, on each other. In the sun, in the cold, in the rain ... And they can give such a body at best in the bag. When my father’s colleague was buried, at the time of the funeral from the coffin, the worms fell out, ”says Catherine.

As a result, she collected biomaterial for DNA examination and sent it by "Russian Post" - in the spring. Since then, she has not received any answer from the morgue, except for the notification that the parcel has reached. She cannot get through to the morgue.

- I have a familiar boy, we grew together. He is a military man. His colleague was in Rostov in June, worked in the morgue. I thought that it was possible to somehow do it through it to quickly. But it turned out that due to the fact that they are now killed from Donetsk and Lugansk to Rostov, there is complete confusion, starting from documents and ending with bodies, even the bodies of the Ukrainian military are acted, ”says Catherine.

At the same time, on the hotline of the Ministry of Defense, Catherine said that her father was not listed either dead or missing. All this time she is trying to get at least some documents confirming that her father was really at the front. There is a part number, the number of the order by which her father began to serve, but in her arms she does not have a single paper from the "DPR".

-In my area, I am sent from one fund to another, and so endlessly in a circle: funds-funds funds, some public structures, again funds ... The military commissariat at the place of residence did not accept a single statement from me. I asked to send a request that I did not have official papers, that dad fought. I know when there was an order, what date, what number. But I have no papers. And I run, like Ivanushka-Durachk, with a birth certificate, a certificate of a change of surname and a passport. Nobody wants to do anything with us. I wrote to the governor ( Kaliningrad region to Anton Alikhanov ) in personal messages, they answered me that they would help, take control - and this lasts nine months. I also wrote to the government of the Kaliningrad region on social networks. They say to me: "Contact the fund." In addition to "call here, call there," I don’t hear anything new.

Everything that happens to Catherine in Kaliningrad is unofficially explained by the fact that her father went to war from the "DPR".

- And what is the difference - ours or Donetsk? In my opinion, they are fighting the same way, in some rows. But there is a difference, Russian and Donetsk-Lugansk. To Donetsk and Lugansk, I rudely say they treat as a discharge. They are just cannon fodder. I constantly called to the military commissariat of Donetsk, and when I was tired of them, they told me that my father is a worked out material and so that I would no longer bother them, ”says Ekaterina.

"I am already ready for the funeral"

Catherine alone brings up five children. The youngest is 9 months old, the eldest is 12 years old, with her husband in divorce. She wanted to go to the "DPR" to solve the problem on the spot, but her friends dissuaded her.

- Naturally, I would go with the children. But the rear is not there. At any moment there may be a arrival, and not only me, but also children. Here you will not guess where it will fly from. But I have no one else. I have me and children. Former husband, thanks to him, helps. But to leave five children with a man ... I'm afraid that no man can cope. He does not have mom, dad is disabled. In the military commissariat, one woman offered me to hire a nanny. And the youngest then I had five months. I replied to her: "And you are ready to leave your five -month -old child with a nanny, without the belief that you will go back?" If I had no children, I would go. But to leave and not know whether you will return or not ... I can’t do this with my children, ”says Catherine.

In her opinion, at the Kaliningrad military enlistment office they do not want to help her “out of personal hostility”: when mobilization began, she defended her ex -husband’s right not to go to the front. At that time, the couple had four children, and Catherine was preparing for the birth of a fifth child. At the same time, under Russian law, the fathers received a delay from mobilization at least three children, as well as if the wife is at the 22nd week of pregnancy. Despite the law, the wife of Catherine wanted to mobilize the Kaliningrad military enlistment office.

- I brought all the confirming documents that his children were dependent, that he pays child support. There they looked at the papers. Yeah, they say he is a veteran of hostilities! Now, they say, we’ll take it, for two or three days, he does not need retraining-and the front line. And I have just two months before giving birth. I explain: we have four children. There is no mother, dad is fighting. There is no one with whom I could leave the children when I leave for the hospital. And the commissar says to me: "Do not worry, the state will take care of children." I turned to the prosecutor’s office, and the commissar, let's say, received on the head. The ex -husband was not taken away. After that, the commissioner, to put it mildly, sends me, says Catherine.

Catherine does not know if she will ever receive her father’s body.

- Everything is ready for my funeral. Today, only the land that is allocated in fact is not ready, with the bus stipulated, only the date and time I need to find out. All wreaths, crosses have already been paid, everything is ready for me to meet my father. It is stipulated with the morgue that, as soon as he acts, he will be put in the refrigerator. Everything is ready - just give it out, ”says Catherine.

Losses due to the war of Russia in Ukraine include citizens of Ukraine, the Russian Federation, as well as the so-called "DPR" and "LPR" and citizens of other states that participate in hostilities.

According to US officials in August 2023, more than 120 thousand people are killed and wounded among the Ukrainian troops. According to the same source in August 2023, among Russian troops - more than 120 thousand only killed.

The so -called "Lugansk People's Republic" and "Donetsk People's Republic" do not disclose data on losses. "LPR" does not give statistics since the beginning of the full -scale invasion of Russia to Ukraine, which began on February 24, 2022. "DPR" stopped publishing information in December 2022. According to journalists from the Russian BBC and Mediazones service, by the beginning of March 2023, at least 1,700 and 5400 people, respectively.