"I want to give hope." Like a girl who survived the rape, she was able to defend herself

For several days on the Web, they discuss the story of Valentina Bodrova - a girl who went on a date with a man from the Pure application and survived the rape. As statistics show , most women do not turn to the police in such a situation, but Valentina found the strength to write a statement and was able to achieve punishment for the criminal. “Such things” talked with the girl about what it cost her and how she took the sentence, and also found out why the wife of the convict still believes in his innocence.

Photo: Alex / Unsplash.com

Attention, the material contains a description of the scenes of sexualized violence and victimblem.

"I will never forget his laughter"

Valentina Brandova is 35 years old, she works as a PR manager in the restaurant business in Moscow. Valentine has been using the editing applications for a long time: it was with them that several of her relations began. According to the girl, she is still friends with former partners.

Valentina Bodrova photo: Personal archive of Valentina Peprova

On April 29, 2023, Valentina entered the Pure dating application, and she had a correspondence with Ivan. The man said that he is an actor and loves to cook, Valentina liked it. Ivan invited the girl to a romantic dinner at his house. She agreed, but warned that he would first go to a party to her sister.

The girl agreed with Ivan at ten in the evening, but in the end lingered. The man rushed her and called her a taxi. Getting out of the car, she found out that the payment was in cash - this surprised Valentina. She expected that Ivan would pay a taxi: for her it was a natural gesture from a man.

Valentina decided not to attach great importance to this. She paid and went up to the apartment where Ivan met her. There was another man in the kitchen, Vlad. Ivan said that this is his friend who was near and went to visit. Valentina thought that a friend would leave after her arrival, so she did not worry and agreed to drink a little wine.

Vlad went for a walk with the dog, and Ivan began to cook. In parallel, he and Valentina talked on abstract topics. When Vlad returned, the men continued to drink Gene Tonik. The girl decided that he would go home soon: in life, Ivan did not seem pretty to her. “There was no question of sex,” says Valentina. She drank two glasses of wine. According to the girl, usually due to the features of metabolism, she does not get drunk, but that evening she had a failure in her memory.

The next morning she woke up in the naked bedroom. “I had a strange feeling that something had happened. I decided that there was probably sex. She said that I have to go: dogs are waiting for me. [Ivan] replied that I would go home only when I would give him a blowjob. I thought he was not serious about it, ”recalls Valentina.

According to the girl, she tried to get out of bed, but Ivan did not give her. “He began to grab my neck, hair, blow and bow to his cock,” she recalls. - I saw that I have bruises on my body - I am actively involved in sports, - and said: "Yes, look at yourself, you like the men [beat]."

According to Valentina, Ivan promised to throw her out of the window if she does not satisfy his desire. And then he said: "If you still do not want, I am nursing you"

“He led me into the bathroom, put me on his knees on the rug by the toilet and pissed me from head to toe,” recalls Valentina. - He attracted my face to his anal hole, let the gases and laughed. I will never forget his laughter. I don’t know how much all this was happening in time. At some point, he sharply released him. ”

The girl rushed to look for her things around the apartment and found in another room the sleeping Vlad. According to her, before leaving, Ivan offered her drugs. She refused and went home by taxi, in hysteria, writing down voice messages to her friend.

At home, Valentina took a shower, put things in washing and in a state of shock to calm down, went for a walk with the dog. On the street, the girl noticed that people are strangely looking in her direction. When she returned home, she looked in the mirror and found that her whole face in bruises and swelling. “Even the ear sinks inside were blue,” says Valentina. She wrote in support of Pure, Ivan’s account was blocked.

"I had to tell the whole story from time to time"

At first, Valentina did not want to contact the police. Then she wrote a friend, a former lawyer. Valentina told him about what had happened, and he convinced her to write a statement - for the sake of other girls who were either already injured or may suffer in the future.

Valentina was afraid to go to the police alone. “I did not know what to do and say, I waited for me to tell me that I myself was to blame: I have come to an unfamiliar man, so I received it,” the girl recalls. Then the friend offered to go with her, it supported her. On the way, Valentina learned from social networks that Ivan was married.

Valentina Bodrova after meeting April 29 photo: Personal archive of Valentina Brandova

The next day the man was detained. They also found his friend Vlad, both seized phones from both. Valentine immediately felt relief. “[Ivan] would now get high, continued to hang out, laugh, live his life. And for years I would feel like a victim, I would just put it deeper somewhere, ”the girl says.

During the investigation, Valentine had a hard time, at times there was a desire to quit everything. “I had to tell the whole story from time to time - in detail and thoroughly. They asked me: “What hand did he hold you? In what places did he beat you? How many times? How much did it last in time?” It is even more unpleasant than going through all this once. Moreover, mostly men interrogate, ”says Valentina.

Initially, the case was opened under Article 132 - "violent acts of a sexual nature." Valentina had no complaints about Ivan's friend. But when the investigator studied the seized phones, he found a video that changed the girl’s idea of ​​what had happened. Valentina describes this video like this:

“I am lying in amoebic, naked. One fades harshly by my chest, and the other says: “Come on in her ass.” I was oral, anal, and ordinary sex with me. I don't remember anything of this "

Valentina says that she was shown several videos, where men in turn raping her while she lies unconscious. Ivan sent them to friends - some replied that it was unpleasant for them, and paid attention to the fact that the girl was “sleeping”.

Valentine was in shock. After watching the video, she wrote a statement to Vlad. Cases of “violent actions of a sexual nature” and rape by preliminary conspiracy (paragraphs 2 articles 131 and 132 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation) were initiated against men, as well as the manufacture and distribution of pornographic content (paragraph 3 of Article 242 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation).

Valentine was sent to the medical examination only four days after the incident. They did not find traces of drugs or other substances in the urine - perhaps because too much time has passed. The defense of Valentina and the victim herself has questions to the investigation, why she was not immediately sent to a blood test.

The girl also did not find injuries from rape. At the medical examination, she was told that formally she could be considered a virgin. Valentine assumes that there was no injuries, because under the influence of the lifting substance it was completely relaxed - or it is an individual feature of her body.

In the case of sexualized violence, the victims should be sent as soon as possible to medical examination, says lawyer Oksana Feoktistova, who worked with such matters. During the examination, they make “flush”: they take cells that can confirm sexualized actions. Then it is necessary to prove that they were committed against the will of the victim, for example, when she was in a helpless state.

Feoktistova says that after rape, internal organs can really remain intact. In this case, you need to focus on other evidence: traces of beatings and “flush”. The fact that Valentina was sent to medical examination only after four days can be a procedural violation, Feoktistova believes.

According to Valentina, the investigation relied mainly on video and interrogations of witnesses - they spoke with her friend and sister, with whom she spoke on April 29 and 30. Valentina also requested screenshots of correspondence with Ivan at Pure: I wanted to prove that I did not count on sex, especially group. According to the girl, in support of the application, she was replied that all these data are deleted after 24 hours. "Such cases" sent a request to Pure. At the time of publication, there was no answer.

Photo: TIM MOSSHOLDER / UNSPLASH.com

"Ivan is very caring, loving"

Ivan Yakovlev is 36 years old, he works as a coach in a fitness room and is working as a mass actor. In 2020, on the set, he met Anastasia, a year later they got married. “Ivan is very caring, loving,” says the girl. “This is the person who brings breakfasts to bed every day, wears you in his arms, gives you the last money, the last forces to ensure that the wife is satisfied.”

Ivan has an ex -wife and two daughters of 16 and 14 years old. They live with their mother in Sochi, but, according to Anastasia, they constantly call up with dad and sometimes come to him in Moscow.

Anastasia does not believe that her husband used validing applications. “Ivan is a fairly prominent man, and the girls have always met him themselves,” she says.

Anastasia Yakovleva with her husband photo: personal archive of Anastasia Yakovleva

The girl says that she and her husband had a common company. It also included Vlad, a friend of Ivan, whom Valentina met in his apartment. The court website states that the full name of Vlad is Vladislav Volod. “Such matters” tried to contact him in one of the messengers, but the person who owns the account refused to comment in rude form.

The day before Ivan met with Valentina, the couple seriously quarreled: they could not decide on what dates the children would arrive. “I said I'm leaving,” says Anastasia. - collected a small suitcase and turned off the phone. He did not know where I was. For him, this was a big blow. ” Anastasia left her parents.

A few days later, she returned for the dog-and only then she learned from the neighbors that something had happened in the apartment. “For another day I was looking for my husband for investigative insulators,” says Anastasia.

The first court was held in early May. As a preventive measure, Ivan was appointed house arrest : he was forbidden to go out, use social networks and communicate on the phone. Anastasia returned to Ivan and began to live with him again.

The girl says that at first it was very difficult for her: she worked with a psychologist, their conversations lasted five to six hours. In July, the couple finally came to a "peace agreement." This is how Anastasia formulates it:

“I am bad about betrayal, but I think that both partners are always to blame for this. I understand that [provoked my husband], saying that I am leaving and I do not need him "

Anastasia does not believe that Ivan committed crimes. “I have been living with him for three years, I know his ex -wife, I know the children,“ a person is clearly not capable of this, ”she says.

Ivan's wife believes that Valentina really wanted to have sex and knew what she was going on. According to Anastasia, the victim decided to take revenge on the man for not paying her a taxi, and then pretended to be a “victim” to get the approval of others.

The lawyer Ivan Yegor Panin has a similar position. According to the lawyer, for about a month Valentina said that she had sexual connection with a man voluntarily, but at some point asked to stop-then Ivan began to persuade her to oral sex. Later Valentina allegedly changed the testimony.

Anastasia Yakovleva photo: personal archive of Anastasia Yakovleva

While Ivan was under house arrest, Anastasia covered life with her husband on her blog . According to his wife, Ivan "rejoiced at the sun, heaven, stood up every day at six in the morning, made affirmations, meditation, prepared breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and was engaged in dogs." Anastasia says that she and her husband seemed to have changed places: she worked as a coach in a fitness club, and he followed the house.

At some point, offensive comments appeared on the blog: the girl wrote that she is a “creature” and “maniac wife,” says Anastasia. Then she told subscribers about the criminal case and shared her view of the situation.

Valentina filed a motion to change the preventive measure for Ivan: she suspected that he had talked with witnesses and with Vlad through his wife's phone. However, the appeal of the victim was rejected.

Five months ago, Anastasia became pregnant. They did not plan a child with Ivan. “I believe that children are a soul that comes to teach us something,” says the girl. - It is impossible to plan. When the soul comes, no one knows. ”

Now Anastasia’s account is closed. She worries about Hayt and does not want to worry during pregnancy. However, Valentina claims that the girl continues to give comments on her husband’s case, “warming the subscribers”.

Mitting circumstances

House arrest was appointed to Vlad. According to Valentina, a few months ago a man fled and probably left the country. Now he is on the federal wanted list.

In the proceedings there was generally “a lot of surprise,” Valentine believes. For example, prosecutors often changed, one came to the meetings unprepared, and did not appear at the debate of the debate at all. From this, the girl had a sense of depreciation:

“A terrible thing happened to me. This is not some kind of fraud, not some crap-they abused me sexually. And nobody needs it "

On December 29, the Khoroshevsky court of Moscow sentenced Ivan Yakovlev. The man was appointed 6.6 years in a general regime colony taking into account all articles.

Lawyer Oksana Feoktistova says this is an average term for such cases. The court took into account mitigating circumstances - minor children whom the man financially supported, and the pregnant wife, explains Ivan’s lawyer.

The man himself finds himself guilty only in the spread of pornography. His fault on articles on rape and “violent actions of a sexual nature” has not been proven, according to Ivan’s lawyer.

Both defense and accusation filed an appeal to the Moscow City Court. Anastasia hopes that her husband will be able to justify according to articles about rape and “violent actions of a sexual nature”. If Ivan is still sent to the colony, she is going to “give birth, be a mother” and wait for her husband. “I am sure that we will go through all the trials. As Vanya says, God loves us, He will help us, ”says Anastasia.

Valentina demands that Ivan be increased to 7.6 years of the colony, as the prosecutor requested. “I would like him to sit at all for life,” says the victim. “But my lawyer says that he is enough, given how the zone relate to people convicted of such articles.”

Photo: Pratik Gupta / Unsplash.com

"I do not blame you, but you just fucked up"

Now Valentina works with a psychologist to cope with a post -traumatic shock. It is difficult for her to trust men, meet, communicate. “At first, it seemed to me that everyone wanted only sex from me. Thoughts came: who will love me now, after what happened to me? I cried a lot, ”says the girl.

After the court decision, Valentine seemed to be restored. But she is still worried about publications on the blog of Anastasia. Ivan’s wife, for example, wrote that before a date, the girl could cover her bruises with tonal cream, then to pretend to be beaten and slander men. According to Anastasia, Ivan and Vlad allegedly first wanted to drive Valentine, since her appearance “left much to be desired”, but the girl quickly “got down to business”.

Anastasia explained to “such matters” that it relates to rape negatively. But at the same time he believes that she would not have encountered violence, since she observes precautions.

“I will never go home to someone, I will not go to the dark lane, I will appoint a meeting in the center, in a crowded place, call myself a taxi so that it is tracking it,” Ivan’s wife is sure

According to Anastasia, women can blame men of violence if they just did not like sex. “I have girlfriends who talked about rape, and in fact it turned out that it was just painful, they themselves endured, and then turned on the victim’s position. It seems to me that you can always say [partner] that you do not like, and offer to stop. If this is not a maniac, but a normal, adequate man, he will stop, ”she says.

After Valentina told her story publicly, people began to leave many comments with similar thoughts. Under the post on the page of the Wonderzine publication, they wrote: “I am very sorry for you, but you yourself understood what could happen. You missed the most important red [flags], I do not blame you, but you just fucked up. ” On this comment there is like from the account, which belongs to CEO Pure in Russia Olga Petrunina.

The accusation of the victims, or Victimbling, is a problem that people who have survived rape or sexualized violence often face. Including, therefore, about 90% of the victims decide not to contact the police.

“I am scared and insulting for these people,” says Valentina. - I want to give them hope: fight that a person who has committed a terrible thing does not remain unpunished and does not continue to create what he did. Это тяжело, это отнимает много моральных сил, времени, денег. Но это того стоит».

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