Lord, are you doing this to me?

Priest Andrey Mizyuk - about eternal winter, among which the New Year still comes

Another year gone by. It seems that the previous three took much longer than their allotted 365 days. They already contained a new life, and even a new heaven and earth. This is about myself and geographically. What about others?

Lord, how many terrible and irreversible changes have happened over the past year and in general in recent times in the lives of tens and hundreds of thousands of people!.. How many sorrows and disasters have come and are coming, and there is no end or edge in sight to this field, which, as the wisdom says, is not to pass through life... Or maybe this wisdom is wrong? Maybe we have already lived more than one such strange and terrible life on this field? Lord, why was this winter sent to us for many years? Lots of questions...

But today I would like to leave these questions and recall a passage from the letter of the Apostle Paul to the Thessalonians. And perhaps, with this passage, try to complete another personal year of your life.

*“...See that no one repays evil for evil; but always seek the good of each other and everyone. Always be happy. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” *(1 Thess. 5:15).

Words that, in these times, can probably cause irritation. Even in previous years, they seemed like something so impossible to accomplish, something encrypted, as if by pronouncing them, the apostle had something else in mind. But again and again they stubbornly emerge in the memory and light up again as a beacon in the middle of the pitch-black, stormy sea of ​​life, as if suggesting that the shore is much closer, that peace and warmth can be felt even now, when hope and faith have been seriously shaken, and there is no love left in this world at all.

But the Apostle Paul did not encrypt anything and did not mean anything else. Do not repay evil for evil, seek good, rejoice, pray, give thanks. This is the will of God for us in Christ Jesus.

Everything is more than clear. No subtext, nothing hidden. But how to live with this and, most importantly, how to fulfill it? This is God’s will for me, right? But

How, in a world that has long since become like a madhouse or an infirmary with people seriously wounded by fear and hatred, try to talk about it and live it at least partially?

I don't know. I don't know how to offer this to a small group of people. I don’t know whether the residents of one staircase, much less an entire city, will be able to coexist with each other like this. I don’t know how to put this into my ears and fit it into the heart of the whole world. I read this in a message to a specific group of people. So what if the meaning is addressed to all of us? So what? What's the point?

Where and how should one live in order to at least try to apply this in personal experience? On a desert island? Well, yes, it's probably possible. There is no one there to repay evil for evil. But there is no need to look for good there either. Not for anyone. This means that everything else that can be given to a person in order to make this world brighter is also not needed there. Neither rejoice, nor thank, much less pray. Why?

We ask ourselves: is there such a desert island?

Undoubtedly. But don't look on the map, the globe has nothing to do with it. Each of us carries it within ourselves. It's about our heart. Somehow it happened that in this world, where overnight evil and its power became so powerful, our heart began to die much faster than its physical wear and tear. It dressed itself in indifference. It tried on deafness and considered it possible for itself to go blind.

Yes, maybe this is such a childish attempt to “hide in the house” from all the horror that now reigns in the yard, but this does not explain or justify anything. And what's more, it won't help. The apparent painkiller is actually just a slow poison. Which today makes me indifferent, and tomorrow I am already part of that darkness that is so close to my soul in every dishonest and unfair act, in every bad thought. I hid, but the spirit of cold and evil will enter through the imaginary walls of my refuge, and I will cease to be alive. Although I will continue to live, and perhaps quite well.

What did I really forget?

That these words from Paul’s letter are addressed to me personally. Yes, through thousands of years they were translated into a language I understand and sent to me personally. The person who is currently typing this text is thinking, nervous, in a hurry to go to work, wants to drink coffee, angry because of the snow that has fallen.

To me. Personally. And this thought - after many years and many mistakes, trials, disappointments and successes, it finally came to me. This is my homework. For now, for this morning, for this day, for the week, for working hours, for the coming sleep. And, Lord, can we also have a souvenir at the last hour? Well, so that I can just honestly tell myself that in my life there was such a small, but my personal piece of time when I did not repay evil with evil, I looked for good. I tried to rejoice and pray. And thank you. I really want there to be a word of gratitude at that very end, unknown to me in terms of timing.

Therefore, I hasten to pronounce them at the end of this year. I have a reason for this. Is it true.

But I also want these words to stay with me longer. Could it be that something else in this world will begin from me or from you with their help? I don't know. But I must try.

May the coming year give us hope for peace and light. We can't change much, but we can begin to change ourselves.

When the apostle speaks about the will of God about us, he is not talking about a directive for execution with a report in paper form, but about the fact that the Lord wants to see us different, desires and thirsts for this. But it is impossible to become such only by His desire. It must be our will.

Happy New Year...