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Because I saw a direct connection between the group and homosexuality, roughly speaking, two old fagots singing either disco or something else. And then I started thinking. And he became gloomy. And he became sad. And I thought - do I really need a mixer and new jeans? <...> I felt the unpleasant touch of the world, towards which I felt the most natural disgust. <...> I allowed the casting and refused.

"Absolutely true story. At the beginning of the 2000s, there were many shady characters in London who were involved in shady affairs. I wanted to communicate with Russian speakers, I even tried to contact the local KVN. And this Igor gave us a hack for 600 bucks - then for me it was fabulous money. I knew absolutely nothing about the Pet Shop Boys; moreover, even now I don’t remember a single one of their songs. But I refused because I was homophobic, that’s all. For any heterosexual teenager, homophobia is a very natural state of mind. It’s as if you’re not quite a man yet, and you’re very wary of anything that might call your masculinity into question. And the easiest way to prove it is to establish yourself at someone else’s expense. That is, this is not an ideology, but simply - ugh, fagots. It's easy to be homophobic without ever knowing someone gay. I went to Oxford and realized that they are people too. But I really rethought my attitude after returning to Russia. Because here homophobia is not “ugh, I don’t like it” - it’s “deprive of rights, lock up at home, stone to death.” It is clear... [pepper] that I do not want to associate myself with such people. In general, I think that homophobes should have their own clubs, just like gays, so that they can go there and not interfere with the homophobes. But just as I can’t stand hysterical homophobes, I can’t stand their version in the form of European hypocritical political correctness. My homies and I can call each other fags a thousand times as a joke, and not a single LGBT rights advocate would dare tell me that this is wrong. As Žižek put it well on this topic, “dirty humor and ritual insults are the civilized way to prevent bloodshed.”

Text by Felix Sandalov

Photos by Ivan Kaydash