Translated material
A good argument
When Sasha was little, I constantly fell into a stupor from an unsolvable problem. Well, why, why the child, knowing what to do and how to do, still stubbornly fushes. Here it is told: "Take the toys!" Everyone understands that the toys will not scatter just like that, and parents are firm and unshakable, they will not remove them either. But the boy, closing under the pretext of cleaning in the room, builds his plasticine locks or simply scratches his nose.
Or lessons. “Sadiah for lessons, Sadia for lessons!” He seems to have sat down to sit down, but some Lukyanenko lies under the Russian textbook, and the offspring read so inspiredly that he does not notice a threat hanging over his head in the form of an angry parent. Is he hoping that the rule itself will learn? Or what will they not ask tomorrow? Or is it never useful?
In general, we cursed on this basis scary. They punished, persuaded, bribed - everything in vain. The problem remained a problem, a constant hot spot in a relationship - perhaps to the Sashin decade.
And then - no, not Sasha suddenly wiser sharply and was imbued with responsibility. Just my mother stopped picking out a dust dust from the children's eye and found a log in her own. The habit of postponing all the most unpleasant things in later - do I have it? Isn't I pulling often with writing an article until the last night? Or with cleaning - almost before the arrival of the guests? Pereu-chan, still pulling. Why? Yes, not why. I just don't want to. Not everything in life is joyful and fun, it is not always possible to even make yourself engage in unloved business. How then there may be claims to the child!
So for some period I lagged behind Sasha and took up self-education. The regime of the day, food, fulfillment of obligations, bad habits - attempts to adjust such moments from the family cannot be concealed. Yes, I didn’t try - I directly asked, including from my eldest son: “Remember, correct me, so you will help.” The topics “why I don’t want to do something out loud and how to turn into a pleasant thing” and “as unfulfilled intentions turn around in the future.”
Alexander first rejoiced at this state of things, regularly pushed his mother, not without malice reminded of promises and intentions. But since in response he received “Oh, thank you for reminding”, very quickly the ulcer fell off, and the really very convenient regime of mutual control remained. In addition, the offspring copied the parental “techniques” and also began to ask for reminders and use self -motivation: “Now we will quickly remove and sit down to watch a movie.” The main thing is that all this has learned and took root! The other day I call my son to the village:
What are you doing?
How what? Lessons!
At four o’clock? Usually you are once later ...
Mom, I decided that I want to sleep more. So, lessons must be done earlier. And all evening I have free!
True, Sasha has one big problem - how to persuade yourself ... wash and brush your teeth! I don’t know why this is such a stumbling block, but if you don’t remind it in the morning, it will easily go to school with an unexpected pug. I moaned, now my grandmother groans. Alexander himself also understands everything perfectly-the consequences are exposed in the literal sense of the word. He tries to motivate and re -educate himself, loves new “washouts”. To develop a dental habit, they decided to purchase a brush with a “motor” - a funny gadget, the teenage boy should work.
But in general, both me and Sasha “live” is quite difficult. It is felt some tight inner resistance, you have to process yourself, re-educate. It’s just that now we and my son are not opponents in this struggle - one is pointing, the other dodges, but the associates. We share, learn, discuss, the main thing - we accept and understand each other's weaknesses.
But the youngest ... The youngest threw me a big surprise, being an extremely “right” boy. Leo is now approaching the five -year period - the age when more and more responsibility falls on him. Frankly, I expected a fairly resistance. The child was stubborn, if he decided to firmly “no”-you will not move. But he also firmly observes his “yes”.
The first surprise was caused by my lion's conscious rejection of sweets.
Do you want Kinder Surprise?
No, I am allergic!
But here, I think, the child has already studied a simple relationship: ate candy - he began to itch. However, at his age, knowledge of the consequences did not stop. You never know what is not useful! I want it.
And for Leo it is “useful” - an iron argument. Here he is, like many children, does not like raw bow. But the cold season began, and the grandmother said: "We need to eat onions, it is useful, it will protect against the disease." And the lion frowns, but eats. But he was ill for this winter only once - easily and quickly.
It would seem very good. Hard character, trust in adults, the ability to logic, the habit of taking care of health and other remarkable qualities. But standard children's arguments do not act at all. You definitely can’t lure him with candy. He must necessarily make sure that what is required of him is really necessary.
How much we fought with the teaching and telling of poems, huh?! And “to please mom”, and “for Grandfather Frost”, and “like other children”. But if the lion said “I don’t want”, the lion will not. But the grandmother once stated that poems are developing memory. And it turned out that this is an occasion and an argument!
Now the child learned the quatrains per day for the development of memory. And he confidently recites, missing the phase of the traditional children's trunks "Nafa Tanya G'emko P'yatchet." Because in parallel it is very seriously and responsible for the production of sounds. It is even strange to observe: such a little thing is sitting, it is busy there with its designers and, as it were, performs speech therapy exercises in between:
- Trrritte Trrri Corrings Enchanted-lavirrwa ...
And here again I can’t refuse my son in logic - first I need to learn how to talk correctly, and then - read poetry.
Here, however, the case does not go with the score - only having lured the game, it is possible to persuade Leo to calculate fingers, coins, cars. But, I believe, this is because we have not yet picked up an argument that is understandable to the child - why does he, in fact, need this account.
It’s good that he still-pah-pah-pah-does not ask why children go to school. But just in case, I am already preparing answers to this question.
To be continued.
For the previous publication, see here .