Reclaiming whoreness

I recently read “ The Ethics of Whoredom ” and the advertising essence of this book is already clear from the title. I was very impressed, not so much by the text itself, but by the fact that it was, in principle, written by someone.

I was impressed because I found a bunch of myown thoughts in the text and finally realized that I was not alone in my fucking view of life, and I rarely find understanding in these ideas and deeds.

Lyrical digression

The idea of ​​advertising is clear and close to me, and I began to practice it much earlier than I heard this strange word. Advertising (to reclaim) in a broad sense means - to correct, restore, cultivate. This is not just the use of “scary” words, but in this way changing their negative meaning to a neutral, even, familiar one, without any excitement or acute emotional reactions. Moreover, often this applies not only to the words themselves, but to the phenomena that they name.

I have already spoken about the “fag” advertising, but why not go further? And I’ll brand whoreness, both as a word and as a phenomenon. Well, why not? True, this is a borderline topic and I am sure that now I will fall greatly in the eyes of many, but, in the end, I am not a Snickers to please everyone. Therefore, if the word “whore” makes you cringe, then it’s better not to read further. I warned you.

Does the word “whore” hurt your ears? Congratulations, me too. You can, of course, be disingenuous and call whoredom promiscuity, but these are the same eggs, only in profile, it just sounds more neutral. But I consider such euphemisms to be like sweeping garbage under the sofa: you can’t see it yourself and you’re not ashamed in front of your guests. The word “whore” already exists - ready-made, and this, in fact, is the whole Occamian essence of advertising: not to create new entities, but to use those words that already exist. And if “faggot” instead of “gay” or “homosexual” is largely a protest and a challenge, then whoredom is whoreness, and no other words have been invented for it.

Fuck this is bad!

I'm treading on some pretty slippery ground with slut advertising. The words “whore” and “whore” carry too much negative charge even in our gay community, not to mention society as a whole (although, traditionally, a woman whore is perceived much worse than a whore man, for the same reason that male homosexuality is bad, bad, and female homosexuality, well, in principle, it’s even okay, with beer).

Social and moral attitudes towards whores are unconditional and always come with the saying “everyone knows that...” And everyone knows that whore fucks with everyone indiscriminately, she doesn’t care who she fucks with, the whore is unemotional and indifferent to the feelings of others, whore is incapable of stable, long-term, close relationships, whore fucks 10 times a day and that’s not enough for her, the whore is fed up with sex and engages in it only because of sexual addiction, the whore is immoral and sinful by definition... In short, being a whore is bad, because it’s very bad! Don't be a whore, don't be a whore! Actually, the whole “Ethics of Whores” (as well as my own feelings and experience) suggests that all these stereotypes about whores may be wrong.

From childhood, we are all given the non-whore model of behavior as the only correct one: monogamous relationships with a single partner, sexual and sensual fidelity, sex for love, etc. etc. Remember fairy tales, novels, movies: they lived long, happily and died on the same day. And this is so natural that no one has any doubts, and any non-monogamous relationship automatically falls into the category of immoral. But we are all people, we are all human, so occasionally no, no, yes and yes! But this happens, as a rule, in violation of external moral and ethical standards, which automatically gives rise to internal conflict and subsequent feelings of guilt. Why? Yes, because it’s impossible! Why not? Because it's bad!

And even the free assumption that whores can be ethical, and whores can be good and, oh horror, “this is normal™” causes an acute attack of idiosyncrasy, rejection and rejection among the overwhelming majority, because, no, son, this is fantasy! It may seem that with this text I am justifying my own whoreness (to myself and others), but there is one logical discrepancy here: in order to justify something, you must first condemn it. And for me, despite the opinion of the majority, whoredom has always had a plus sign, an aura of elitism, an unattainable utopia, a parallel Universe, where everyone fucks for pleasure, and does not fuck each other’s brains, including their own.

But if during the period of realizing my homosexuality I was crushed by heteronormative background homophobia, then later exactly the same thing happened with whoredom. For a long time all my bodily impulses remained only dreams, because in the bud they ran into a dogmatic wall: whoredom is bad! changing is bad! fucking with several at once is bad! Fucking in front of others is bad. Bad, bad, everything is bad, except for the standard familiar position behind a closed door in the dark under a blanket and only with my husband.

Fuck! I’ve always felt cramped within these frameworks, but I’m not bad, I’m good! So no nonsense! And only in my dreams did I imagine sex with a bunch of men, cruising, orgies and other fagot porn scenes - unrestrained fucking, free from frames and restrictions, but still with beautiful eyeliner, meeting by the sea and other romantic foreplay. Because I’m not just a whore, but a romantic and sensitive whore. Sounds like an oxymoron? Well, what can you do?

And I’ve had such fucking dreams since a very young age, from the moment my sexuality began to awaken. But the trouble is, she turned out to be tightly locked inside first a homophobic and then an anti-whore cage, which I built myself, but according to the drawings and instructions of social and moral norms.

Inner Demons

And so, halfway through my earthly life, I found myself in a dark forest, but this forest turned out to be a fucking forest. It’s a little late, but I overcame another model of behavior imposed by society, and began to carefully practice whoredom, with my knees shaking from fear. So what did I discover? Nothing! The world did not collapse, the heavens did not open up, the Earth did not fly into the celestial axis, and if fiery Gehenna shines, it will be in some distant future. But, despite some practice, my anti-whore attitudes (as well as the remnants of internal homophobia) have not gone away, and every time I enter this alluring whore path, I have to overcome them, but, fuck, it’s worth it! And I won’t lie here: the very violation of generally accepted norms and rules warms my fucking soul and gives additional adrenaline and excitement. I did it! I did it! At the same time, I did not succumb to temptation, as is commonly thought, but on the contrary: I overcame my inner demons and realized my dreams. Well, the fact is that these dreams are fucking, well, what can you do, everyone has their own, sorry.

Sex is great!

I realized one simple thing for myself: sex is good in all forms, including fucking, and beauty, as you know, is in the eyes of the beholder. And if in fucking non-monogamous sex you see only dirt, vice, debauchery and immorality, then that’s what it will actually be, but only for those who think so. And for me, any sex is a fucking adventure. Sex with a well-known, trusted partner, with a new one from the social network, one-time casual sex (when you don’t even know his name), cruising sex in the forest and on the beach, public group sex in a sex club...

My whoredom is not the need to constantly change partners. If sex with a guy is great, then I always want to repeat it. But I don’t want to limit myself to one partner, just as I don’t want to limit my sexual expression. Enough is enough, and why? Just because it's customary? Sex can be very different, but we are traditionally accustomed to holding ourselves back in our sexual expressions, although I am sure that in our dreams and fantasies we all want much more than we can afford, and I myself am no exception. But what are these frames for? What do they give?

In fact, sex with different partners is always different, always unpredictable, always improvisational, and this is a separate pleasure. Sex is a form of non-verbal communication, so why limit yourself to just one partner? Yes, sex can be successful or not, but it’s always great, and I sincerely enjoy it. I would like to have sex a lot more often, but despite my fucking worldview and all of the above, I have too many residual fears, complexes and self-restraints. They interfere, I fight them, but given my “history,” this process is not easy and slow.

And back to advertising

Yes, the tendency towards sexual promiscuity is popularly called whoredom. But in my perception I managed to remove the negative component of whoredom, first the phenomenon, and now the words. True, in this I went a little too far and got not a neutral word to denote sexual manifestations, but a word with an aura of enthusiasm. Fuck - that sounds proud! And whoredom for me is not a vice, but simply one of the manifestations of sexuality, as cool as any other. And I finally accept whoredom as part of my personality because... I don’t want to hide it or suppress it anymore. I don’t want to, because there’s simply no need. Amen.

Markus Reff, author of the channel “Chronicles of a practicing fagot”

Graphics by N. Tolmachev were used.